Family Magazine

I Killed Phyllis Diller

By Guerrillamom @mariaguido
I went to the Blogher Nablopomo prompts page - but then I realized I had a story to tell. Also - I hate writing prompts, following directions, and measuring anything when I cook.
So today was on of those days. My son is sick. His father is freaking out because he is the absolute worst when the kids are sick. I am required to be the voice of calm and reason in this relationship at all times and that does not always end well.
I write four posts a day for Mommyish. It's a job that I love, because in addition to being able to write in my own voice and with my own opinions - I hang out with cool girls on Skype all day. They're my office mates, if you will. Well, today I came across a post in my facebook feed where someone said, RIP Phyllis Diller. I was so sad. I love Phyllis Diller. So I told my colleagues and we all threw up a bunch of sad face emoticons and talked about how great Phyllis Diller was. Then my editor had the idea to do a round up of parenting quotes by Phyllis which I thought was a great idea because I love her and she was my favorite Scooby Doo celebrity guest. So I spent close to an hour working on a really cute story and threw it up on the site.
I went to return a call from Good Morning America (#humblebrag) came back online and my editor says:
Phyllis Diller died last summer. Like - last summer, not the one that just passed. Summer, 2012.
I Killed Phyllis Diller
So there's that.
Oh, there's also this:
I Killed Phyllis DillerThis person looks strangely like me. I mean, my chin isn't that saggy and my neck isn't that big, but apart from those two things it's kind of an eerie resemblence. To the point that when I saw this image, I thought Google was doing some face-recognition wierdness today and I got a little freaked out. So I clicked on the image and it turns out it's of an 84-year-old Indian woman named Shakuntala Devi. A quick glance at Wikipedia told me a little about her."Popularly known as the "Human Computer", Shakuntala Devi was a child prodigy and mental calculatorDevi wrote a number of books, including novels and non-fiction texts about mathematics and homosexuality."I will never be as interesting as this person. And with that, I'm going to bed.Sorry, Phyllis.

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