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Here’s To The End Of A Perfectly Good Pandemic And A Few Things All Humans Should Avoid In The Next One

By Midlifemargaritas @mdlifemargarita

We are finally closing in on last call for the pandemic. It’s been a weird year and we really need to wrap our heads around everything that has happened to us to find some closure. It’s not been all fun and games but was it really that bad? For some yes. Many died and I don’t dispute that. Loss of life is never funny nor is the grief from it for those left in the aftermath. But we need to find the good in it somehow. That’s basically how humans manage to move on from tragedy. So let’s review the weird and wild and see if we learned anything.

One thing that gripes me is when someone says, “stop saying it’s like the flu because it’s not”! Not everyone had the same experience so I find that line obnoxious. I had Covid as did my dear hubster. It WAS like the flu for us. Same length of time and same symptoms. So there’s that. And honestly if you think about it, ANY symptom at all was a symptom of Covid. What does that say? I can tell you this was a wake up call for everyone to take their health more seriously. Unless you’re a YOLO person.

Another point is that we have been wearing masks and washing our hands so much that we have scrubbed our immunities down the drain. I think we may all come out of this finding we might be more susceptible to every little cold or virus for awhile. Oh Joy. Maybe we should all make a date to Chuckie Cheese and get that part over with. Look out ball pit! If they serve margaritas it would be one hell of a party!

Conspiracy Theories are everywhere: It was created in a lab. It was created to wipe out some of the population to help our earth heal from Global Climate Change. The Chinese want to dominate the US and other countries. God is pissed and he’s letting us know it. The list goes on. Do you have a theory? Do you believe in conspiracy theories? You can bet that even those that say no, actually DO believe in a few. No way anyone in this world can believe the governments all have our best interest at heart and are doing all they can to keep us safe and they are all transparent. Give. Me. A. Break.

Let’s go over the debates we have had. Mask or no mask, vaccinate or not. Everyone stay home or not. I think it’ been proven that no one really had the right answer at the right time. Then throw in the fact that so many upstanding people in the world took the time during the pandemic to create chaos, controversy, and bring nasty politics to a whole new level. We’ve been watching the world burn for over a year now. Some of Y’all need to calm down. Using a pandemic to further your scams, politics, violence etc. is pretty ballsy. Those are the people who would throw their own grandmas under a bus. Keeping it classy!

All the back and forth over whether or not to get vaccinated is ridiculous. Same with whether or not to wear masks. Stop tying to demonizing each other with fear and bullying. It’s not helping. And for those who wear “Kindness” shirts or have Be Kind signs in their yards, I’ve been watching you be oh so NOT kind to others. What’s that about?

So let’s wrap up this essay. What we need to avoid in the next pandemic:

  1. Avoid things like Bats as a food
  2. Don’t hoard things like toilet paper and hand sanitizer
  3. Try to be a part of medical trials for the future. Some pay pretty well.
  4. Wash your hands more often
  5. Don’t trust the news
  6. If you hear of an outbreak of disease anywhere, don’t go there
  7. Don’t eat anything you can’t identify
  8. Question everything and everyone

Some final questions I have that maybe you can answer. The more sarcastic the answer, the more points you get!

  1. Why did kids not really get the virus as much as the adults?
  2. Do people really think this came from a bat soup?
  3. Was it just coincidence that a lab was working on the virus at the time it started and where it started?
  4. Do masks really work?
  5. Do people sometimes get things wrong but stick with it anyway to save face?
  6. Why didn’t my dog get the virus from us?
  7. Did anyone else enjoy being home for a year with the excuse: Can’t hang right now because there’s a virus?
  8. Has everyone caught up on Netflix and HULU?
  9. Did we all learn that celebrities’ are pretty worthless telling us what to do and how to live as they give each other awards and pretend they are more supreme beings than the rest of us?
  10. Am I the only one who kept repeating, “Liar Liar Pants On Fire” during the news every night?
  11. Who else enjoyed the drama on social media because there was nothing else to do but stir up crap? We were all invested and needed to see all the outcomes.
  12. How many “blocked” someone on social media?
  13. Finally, who wants to move on, avoid people and live on an island with no internet from now till the end of time?

Warning Label: THIS is sarcasm and a little humor. It’s meant to entertain and make us laugh at the weirdest time in our lives. You don’t have to think it’s funny or even like me. I don’t like everybody either.

Peace, Love and Margaritas!


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