FFS Friday - See You Next Tuesday

Good morning! I hope you've all had a wonderful week. Can you believe March is nearly over?
Eljay still isn't sleeping well. FFS.
I have had no contact with MIL so it's not because I'm being a See You Next Tuesday (got that off Natalie, isn't it awesome!)
I don't think he's teething, he's been to the chiropractor and as far as I know there are no other reasons why he shouldn't be sleeping well, but he's not. FFS.
I'm fecking exhausted. FFS.
Saturday I had to go out to get nappies for Chai. The boys started fighting the second they woke up and I was drained. FFS.
I was determined it wasn't going to be one of those days so I did my best to cheer them both up, but Chai was too busy missing Daddy to be cheered up. FFS.
We got to the shopping centre, Eljay refused to get into the trolley because he wanted to run around playing with everything and Chai wanted to be carried. FFS.
After losing Eljay twice I put him in the trolley. To show his appreciation he sang me the song of his people the whole time we were out. FFS.

I bought the nappies and the few other things we needed, got the boys into the car, put the trolley in the trolley bay and then realised that I'd got nappies for Eljay not for Chai. FFS.
There was no way I was going to get them out of the car to go and swap them so we went home. FFS.
That meant we had to go out again in the afternoon. FFS.
It was a repeat of the mornings trip. FFS.
Chai wanted to be carried, Eljay didn't want to be in the pram, they both screamed and yelled most of the time we were out, the only difference was I got the right size nappies the second time. FFS.
Monday I came down with a nasty cold. FFS.
I had no-one to help me. FFS.
It should be impossible to get sick when you are solo parenting. FFS.
All I wanted to do was rest and all the kids wanted to do was play. FFS.
Sensing my weakness, they took full advantage of it. FFS.
Things the kids did whilst I was sick:
Spit apple all over the house.
Empty a liter of milk on the floor then splash it all over the chairs, drawers etc.
Bounce a football in the milk.
Put milky hand prints all over the lounge suite.
Take one bite out of four apples then throw them on the ground.
Played soccer with the applies.
Throw an apple in the pool.
Empty out Bella's water five times.
Rub their cups in Bella's poo.
Smear my pink Carmex lip balm all over his face (Eljay).
Get into the junk room and throw toys and clothes everywhere.
Throw their lunch and drinks all over the table then sit in it.
Used the potato masher to try and cut a slice of cheese. 
Climbed on the bench and jumped on my laptop.
Instead of the rest that I so desperately needed, I spent the day tidying up the mess they made. FFS.
No rest for the wicked. FFS.
I'm out. It's your turn now.