I'm not going to yell at my precious babies any more. It's not okay, it's not necessary and it's not who I want to be.
I am going to leave behind that angry, overwhelmed, stressed, yelling person and become the happy, calm person that I want to be.
I know it won't be easy and that I'll fail over and over again, but that's okay. I'll apologise, get over it and try harder next time.
I never wanted to be this person, it's not nice, it's not necessary and the kids don't deserve it. I could give you plenty of reasons to justify why I am this way, but they're just excuses and frankly they aren't good enough. I am in charge of myself, I get to choose who I want to be. This is not who I want to be. I am not being true to myself.
So, it's going to change. I'm going back to the person that I want to be. Happy, calm and centred.
I won the smacking battle and I'll win the yelling battle, minute by minute, hour by hour and day by day.
Wish me luck.
