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I tend to separate my work life to before-children and after-children. I have worked on and off since having my girls but last year I was able to work from home - what a score! I could set my own hours, work in comfortable clothes and not have to worry about peak-hour traffic. Alas, while the work-from-home job was fabulous on paper, the income wasn't flowing back to me as regularly as it should have done, and so now I am back to job-hunting, blah.
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Lately I have made such a comfortable groove with life at home, baking with the girls, trying out new recipes, cleaning when I feel like it and not to a schedule, basically enjoying the whole motherhood roller coaster but I wonder, how much is going to suffer when I go back to work? I was reading today about Gwen Stefani how she is currently preparing for her music comeback. She said that over the past year she has been working away on a new album with her band No Doubt but her biggest fear is what lies ahead - juggling her home life with her work life. She claims that it is a nightmare for her. I guess she must be one of the Hollywood mums who chooses to do it all herself, to not hire help. How refreshingly real of her. But the truth is I get it because I have hired a nanny and a cleaner in the past and while it has helped reduce stress, there is nothing like the satisfaction of being good at your job and good at everything at home also. Ok, I can leave the toilet cleaning to someone else, but I do love to pick my kids up from school, I do love to read to them before bed and to cook their favorite dinner for them as I only I can.
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Mostly I worry about finding the energy to do it all. Adjusting to the changes I will have to make to keep on top of everything. Why does everything have to change? I know that eventually I have to give in and go with the flow, but boy I don't give in without plenty of kicking and screaming. It's not just that life around me changes though, and this is the part that I think makes it so hard for me, it's that it's me who has to change along with life. I have to shape-shift with the change that goes on around me. I just like to get in a groove and stay there all safe and warm.
What about you? How does change effect you? Are you struggling with being a working mother or are you also in the midst of going back to work after having children? I would love to hear your thoughts.
Kisses,
Heidi
