I have been wanting a dove gray mohair sweater for what seems like forever. The contrast in textures with my H&M faux leather skirt was the ideal match. 
Lush Sweater // H&M skirt // Wild Doll heels // F21 necklace
I have terrible nightmares. I've had them for as long as I can remember. When I was in the 7th grade I dreamed I was leaping across large boulders: my father was there with another friend's parent. My father tried to jump, but he missed and fell to his death, and I was left alone. I usually am left alone in my dreams. Since the accident my nightmares have become worse. One of the most terrifying ones I have had was where I was outside alone, in the dark. I couldn't see anything, but I could hear rustling sounds. I had a flash light in my hands and when I switched it on, I realized I was being hunted by two black jaguars. To make matters worse, the flash light kept shutting off. A few nights ago I woke up in a panic because I smelled burnt rubber. The room was saturated with it, but I was the only one who could smell it.Last night I dreamed I was in a large plane, flying over the ocean. Looking out the window I could see large waves forming. Every wave grew in size, until I realized that what I was watching a tsunami barrel towards me. The waves grew so large they struck the underbelly of the plane, causing one of the engines to give out. A second wave overtook the plane, and we began to nose dive into the water. Turning to my boyfriend who was with me, I grabbed his face, looked into his eyes and whispered “Oh my god. This is how we die. This is how we die.” Only it didn’t end there. I came out the other side. I was greeted by a large group of happy people who wore flowers, and was curious as to why I wore shoes. “These poor people come from a place where you have to wear shoes.” I heard one of them say, before removing mine. I told my physical therapist my dream. She told me that she saw it as a sign of hope - that I was going to make it through. I didn’t have the heart to tell her. In my dream I didn’t make it: I was dead.
I remember times when I used to have wonderful dreams: In the 5th grade I "taught" myself how to fly while dreaming. I actually had to practice! It took what felt all night, but after that I would fly in all my dreams. It felt so realistic, that I would often wake up with the sensation that I was still in the process of landing. I wish those dreams would return.
