The “Burning Man festival is currently underway (August 28th through September 5th)! About “Burning Man,” from Wikipedia:
“Burning Man is an annual gathering that takes place at Black Rock City—a temporary community erected in the Black Rock Desert in Nevada. The event is described as an experiment in community and art, influenced by 10 main principles, including “radical” inclusion, self-reliance and self-expression, as well as community cooperation, civic responsibility, gifting, decommodification, participation, immediacy and leaving no trace.”
Funny, no mention of the “orgy dome” on the Wiki page. Apparently it does exist though. Cosmopolitan magazine interviewed two couples who have participated in the orgy dome. From the Cosmopolitan web site:
“Cosmopolitan.com peeked behind the curtain with the help of two couples — Aly* and Dan*, and Jocelyn and Luke — who are orgy dome vets willing to share their stories. Here are his-and-her accounts of their experiences.”
WARNING: Graphic language and details follow. NSFW.
Aly, 26, a production assistant in Los Angeles, California:
The night we went to the orgy dome, the line was super long. I didn’t realize there was such a process to getting in. We were interviewed to make sure we were sober enough to consent and [to check] that we understood all the rules. Verbal consent is necessary to begin play with other groups and to introduce new activities. If you ask if you can play with a couple, you’d still need to ask, “Can I touch your breasts?” “Can I go down on you?” “Can I fuck you both in the butt?” Consent is an active process and can be removed at any point.
I’m glad they have that entry process, but I hadn’t expected them to take it so seriously. It’s like the DMV: You get a number, then you talk to one guy and take a test on the rules, then you wait some more. We’d done some molly and ketamine (not a full dose, just a bump). Waiting in line for an hour sober would have been horrible, but I guess I would have preferred to have been more sober during the experience so it’d be easier to come.
Inside, the main space has mattresses on either side of a main walkway. I was comfortable right away — once you see a lot of other people having sex, it becomes pretty easy to feel like you can do it too.
We got right down to business; you aren’t supposed to sit around and watch, because that would be creepy. I need a lot of concentration to come, and it wasn’t happening. Honestly, sex after a week and a half on the playa is not really all that sexy. My thighs were chapped from riding my bike, which kind of made some of the sex a bit uncomfortable. I also had an ingrown hair from trying to shave in my tent without enough soap and water, and I was self-conscious about that too.
The boys Eiffel towered me, meaning I was on my knees between them, giving one oral sex while the other penetrated me from behind. Then we got the idea for them to double penetrate me, which we hadn’t done before, but we didn’t have the lube required and gave up pretty fast.
The guys used a vibrator on me when we got back to camp later, and that did the trick.
Aly’s partner, Dan, 34, set builder in Los Angeles, California:
I’m always down for the orgy dome, but I never put all my hopes on it or anything. If it happens, it happens. It’s air-conditioned, unlike most places on the playa, which is a big plus. It’s something different and exciting. The organizers are careful to make sure that everyone who goes in intends to have sex — they don’t want anyone just hanging out. If anyone does, they’re asked to leave. Some areas are designated for couples, and other sections are labeled “open for more,” meaning that those couples can be approached by others who want to join in.
Aly and I weren’t together then, but we’d been friends for a long time. There was no expectation of anything sexual, just getting effed up and having a party. The lighting is low and nice, there are nice drapes and comfy couches and pillows, and they provide lube and condoms.
At the time, we were pretty familiar with each other, so it worked out great. I’ve been in several threesomes before, but I enjoy the dynamic that Aly and I have. We’ve always had a thing about trying to Eiffel tower, although it started as kind of a joke. I like to have silly fun when I’m having sex and not take it so seriously. I love laughing — Aly is more open to that than most other people.
I was just excited to be there, especially because it was a rare thing to have sex with Aly because she lived in Chicago back then. So anything would’ve been great, even though when we did try to do double penetration, it didn’t really work out. It never has when I’ve tried it. Overall, it was a good experience and actually pretty funny; when we first walked into the space as it was being vacated, there was a group of our campmates who were leaving. They were like, “Funny seeing you here! We kept it warm for you!”
Jocelyn and Dan
Jocelyn, 28, pastry chef in Portland, Oregon:
The orgy dome at Burning Man was the first time my husband, Luke, and I had group sex together, so I guess you could say it was somewhat of a catalyst for that lifestyle. All kinds of people are there: young, old, and all different body types and nationalities. It’s dark, and there’s sensual music playing in the background. You can practically taste the sexual tension.
Honestly, for us, it started in the waiting area before you’re admitted into the actual dome. I was getting my head, neck, and shoulders massaged by one person, and my feet and legs massaged by another, all while holding hands with someone else. The six of us were giving each other small kisses, and everyone was giggling and excited. It was all very natural, for all of us, which was amazing.
Once they call your group name, you remove jackets and shoes, and they’re stored for you in a cubby outside of the dome. It’s dimly lit inside, air-conditioned, and the ground is made of those black rubberized puzzle-piece floor tiles. There are several mattresses, each with fresh sheets. An attendant escorts you to your mattress. Entrants are also encouraged to use baby wipes and hand sanitizer.
We were probably there for over an hour. The six of us all shared one mattress and eventually took over a second one. At one point, I was being fingered by one of the guys, while his wife was going down on Luke. Luke and I were just looking at each other the whole time, like, “OMG, this is rad.”
I guess I had imagined lots of loud, porn-style, showy sex — but it’s not like that at all. Almost everyone was super intimate with their own partners. Part of the appeal is to have sex semi-publicly, but nobody seemed to be trying to win any Adult Video News awards.
All in all, I loved it. Everyone running the camp knows that consent is essential, and they do everything they can to protect that. Luke and I absolutely feel more bonded after that experience because it encouraged us to be completely open and honest about our needs and our boundaries.
Jocelyn’s partner, Luke, 34, winemaker in Portland, Oregon:
I’ve been to Burning Man three times; I like to go every other year so I don’t get too exhausted. The orgy dome is one of my favorite theme camps.
We went to the dome with two other married couples from our camp, and it was really important to Jocelyn and I to have a preliminary conversation with the people in our group. I’m very into open communication when it comes to sex and life in general. We had this moment early on in the week when we were hanging out with these two other couples and just realized that we were all really into each other. I pulled Jocelyn aside and said, “Hey, is it just me, or do we need to invite them all to the orgy dome?” She was immediately into it, so we asked them that night.
The chemistry we shared was unreal. I think I experienced the best oral of my life that night. We had all been drinking, so that probably helped everyone loosen up. I was happy with my decision to abstain from other drugs, because it meant I didn’t have to worry about “incompetence,” and I could have fun for a longer period of time.
While I didn’t interact with men by sucking or fucking, I definitely made out with them, which tends to be my M.O. during group play. That being said, if a guy grabbed me or started giving me oral, I wouldn’t recoil; the experience of it all seems like it would be worth giving a shot. Everyone was already so close as friends and this just made us that much closer. In a way, we became a little sixsome family afterward.
As for whether or not I was vibing on any one person, Jocelyn and I clearly have very similar tastes in ladies. We talked about it afterward and both felt particularly drawn to one of our friends. Not surprisingly, we slept with her and her husband at our wedding reception! We’re still great friends with the other couple too.
The vibe after the orgy dome was fantastic. We were all still giggly and ready to head out into the wild of Burning Man for the night. We all felt empowered, happy, and wild.
It’s the liberal mantra: “empowering.”
Yet Everyday Health has a different take on this form of sexual promiscuity. As Dr. Eowyn noted in a blog post from last December: “Society puts an emphasis on sexuality — but casual sex can impact your physical and emotional health in ways that you may not suspect.”
But don’t expect Cosmopolitan magazine to offer any analysis other than the “rad” sex part. Disclosing the lasting consequences of promiscuity wouldn’t be “empowering.”
DCG
