Diaries Magazine

Crises, Questions and Dilemmas

By Chardonaldson
I'm having an existential crisis.
Actually crisis is a bit of an exaggeration. It's more that I'm grappling with an existential question. Not a deep existential question like 'why do I exist?' or 'what is the meaning of life?' So I guess that grappling might also be an exaggeration. But I can't think of any better word at the moment so I guess we'll stick with it. Unless I have some bolt of inspiration before I'm done.
My question? If I run and it's not documented photographically, does it actually count?
It used to be that I ran and it counted just because I ran. Then I got my first Garmin and then the run counted because it was uploaded onto the computer. And then I joined the Garmin community and then it counted because other people could see it. Now it's got to be documented in pictures for it to count in my head.
Crises, Questions and Dilemmas
How did things change? Why did they change? Will they change again? Will I cope - especially over the next few weeks when the chief photographers are off swanning in NY (marathon and glory-bound)? Should I even bother running if it's not on Instagram or FB? What IS the meaning of life?
See!! It's a real dilemma.
Funny thing is that I don't even like having my photo taken. Comes from being brought up with very attractive sisters. But I haven't minded it - even though they're taken when I've dragged myself out of bed before the sun's up and I'm usually red-faced, sweating and tousled. And the reason that I haven't minded them is because I look happy. Because I am happy. Running's my happy place. And running with friends is the best!
Crises, Questions and Dilemmas
And talking about crises, we have a little one in the laundry. I only have to wash once a week now that the kid washing is no longer my responsibility and today Iven couldn't find a dry pair of undies!! I had washed and it all would have been fine if the weather had been. I'm not sure how he solved his dilemma and I don't think I want to. There are no good answers to that question. 
I looked around the laundry to see if any of his jocks had fallen behind the dryer (which I won't use unless there's a real weather crisis). No luck. But what I did see were all of the clean, damp running clothes I'd used this week that made up about a third of the wash. So I guess the answer to my existentialist question is that yes, photographically undocumented runs do count and I have the washing to prove it.

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