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Where do I start? I moved into my first flat at the age of nineteen with my boyfriend, not long after that I was told I couldn’t have kid’s, yet to find out months down the line I was expecting, over the moon wasn’t even the words to describe the feeling. I thought everything was prefect me and my boyfriend, yes we had our up’s and down’s, but why did I have funny feeling’s in my stomach when I saw my neighbour?
I didn’t think anything of these feeling’s I just left them to one side and carried on as normal, I saw the neighbor and his girlfriend everyday but carried on with my life with my boyfriend, we had our daughter but our relationship just went down hill. I confided in my neighbour, we spoke for hours and hours on end outside, he made me laugh like never before.
I couldn’t get rid of these feeling so one night I decided to add him on Facebook, we spoke every day, all day unless he was at work or I was at work. The messages were just banter, all fun and games until one day when he asked me to go round for a cuppa, we sat there and talked and before we knew it I had been there for four hours. He looked into my eyes and moved in for a kiss, I kissed him back wrong, the kiss was just amazing, I have never ever felt a kiss like it.
That kiss lasted for ever but I then got up and left, we still had the banter but I tried to stay away and tried to make it work with the boyfriend but something was eating away at me, I wanted more but couldn’t brake up my family, could I be the other women and could he be the other man?
I acted as if nothing had happened and carried on with life, I saw him in the shop and we walked back to the flat’s together, then all of a sudden I felt his lips on mine, he had pushed me up against the wall and kissed me once again, the kiss again was amazing, that’s when the affair started.
My relationship had already broken down and so had his, I hadn’t slept with my boyfriend in over seven months but still couldn’t brake up a family. Every chance we got we would kiss, hold hands, cuddle until it came the day we made love for the first time. Wow that day was the best day of my life, (other than the birth of my daughter of course). I have never in my life felt anything like it, that was the day I told him I loved him, he didn’t say it back but that didn’t bother me, I knew I loved him and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.
The affair went on for months and months, he then said it, those three words that I didn’t get in return. He told me he loved me, he said he loved me from day one but couldn’t say it until the time was right. After six months I decided I couldn’t carry on having an affair. I wanted to have a relationship with him so I told my boyfriend that I didn’t love him and that we were over. He told his girlfriend the same.
They say karma is a bitch and it bites, it sure does. I had the karma three months into the new relationship, I had got caught pregnant on the implant but sadly lost the baby at nine weeks. People will say how wrong I am in having the affair but yet people were not in my shoes. I have been cheated on a few times as well and yes it hurts, yet I also was the cheater and yes that also hurts.
You can not help who you fall in love with and when you fall for them. After a year together we are still going very strong and planning on moving in together. Some of you will ask how will I know he or I will not have a affair again and all I can say is that we don’t know this wont happen but I can tell you that we trust each other with all our
hearts.
We are soul mates, we loved each other from the first day of setting eye’s on each other and we will be with each other till the end..
This post is an anonymous guest post written by a mom from my Facebook mums group. I would love to hear your thoughts …
