Friends.
I can’t tell you how much getting on a schedule has changed my life for the better. My fatigue is G.O.N.E. It’s incredible. I feel amazing. I feel like a bit of an idiot for not doing it sooner.
Speaking of having energy. I didn’t work out today, but I did take 4 children under the age of 6 to the splash park all by mah-self. I invited a friend to go with us by saying “we are going to the splash park if you wanna joint!!” sigh.
For whatever reason my “join” is often and unfortunately autocorrected to “joint.” Thanks Siri. And no, don’t email me, I don’t smoke pot. However, I do have some unconventional thinking about the whole legalization of the MJ thing…surprised? I didn’t think so.
(this isn’t the splash park, but I had to post it, because c’mon. that face)
I don’t have many pics of the day since I spent the entire time making sure that I left with as many tiny people as I arrived with and we only had one meltdown which I count as a win. And by we I mean I. I had a meltdown. Because for about 5 minutes after we got to the car (WITH 4 TINY, SOGGY, TIRED, SANDY, HUNGRY CHILDREN) I thought I had lost my phone.
I would honestly rather someone steal my purse than my phone at this point.
Anyhow…I found it. At the bottom of my purse. Don’t tell my husband, he’s convinced that my purse is the black hole containing everything that can’t be found. He’s usually right but I don’t need for him to know it at this point.
I’ve also started watching a few friend’s kids at my house on Tuesdays. Just for fun. I figure, I’m already watching my own, it honestly doesn’t make a huge difference to add a few more in the mix. Plus, I have my most ingenious idea ever to help a mama out.
It’s a little dark but you get the point. Genius, right?? Dutch. Door. Get yourself one today.
I also frequently kick them all outside with the dogs. I do have to warn the other mothers not to send their kids to me with nice clothes on. Any time a small human shows up at my house is gingham and smocking I just sigh, feeling a twinge of guilt about all of the dirt that will be covering that starched git-up in a matter of mere minutes. Kids usually come looking like children and leave looking like little gremlins. But we have fun and hey, playing in the dirt builds the immune system. You’re welcome, other mamas.
This is why Miles rarely wears clothes. There’s just no freaking point. He’s playing (i.e.: rolling around, crawling, wrestling, digging, sword fighting, “riding” the dog, etc.) all day long. Plus, he potty trained right after he turned 2 so the obvious place for him to go is on the trees outside. Lack of clothing is just plain and simple practicality. I just hose him off at the end of the day (if we’re lucky) and we do it all again the next.
Oh, we finally got mattresses for the boy’s bunk beds that Hank designed. We don’t exactly feel like dishing out the $$$ for organic mattresses at this point (ahem, full-house renovation) so we bought used ones since most of the off-gassing will have occurred in someone else’s home.
Used mattresses? Ew.
I know. But here’s the thing. We found them from an older couple in an spotless home and they are free of stains, odors, and both had mattress protectors on them. For $100 total we are happy for our kids to pee on them for years to come.
Anyhow, the boys are freaking out about the beds and like to spend a few hours a day playing in them. We don’t stop them.
Etta is stil screaming. HER. LUNGS. OUT. Not because anything is wrong. Just because she can. And holy hell, she is LOUD. My husband commented that he must have larger than average vocal chords (the man can not physically whisper y’all) and that all of our kids got them from him.
He’s right. Help.
We’ve tried everything: ignoring it, screaming back (this just terrified her so that she screamed more), telling her “no”, popping her hand (this just made her throw her head back and do the most pathetic wail you’ve ever heard.
So, needless to say we are taking suggestions.
You can tweet with the hashtag #stopthepterodactyl
TIA.
Also, please send new jammies. This is getting rediculous she says.
Also, I think Henry may be a math whiz. He turns 6 in December and added this column, without using his fingers, all in his head, looking at it upside-down.
*Y’ALL A FREAKING MOSQUITO JUST FLEW IN MY EAR AND I SMACKED THE EVERLOVING CRAP OUT OF MY OWN FACE AND STILL MISSED IT!! IS THERE ANYTHING MORE ANNOYING??*
I digress.
Anyhow, I don’t know how I’m supposed to homeschool this kid. I taught him numbers and simple math and he’s literally taught himself the rest.
“Math just makes sense in my brain” he says when I ask how he knows how to add and subtract such big numbers.
My dad is somewhat of a math genius and my husband aced college engineering and math, so I guess we had it coming.
Poor fella, I just don’t want to hold him back…I guess that’s what tutoring is for?
Anyhow, I’m gonna go soak in my big beautiful tub. Rub some oils on my feet and go to bed.
Actually, no, scratch that. Just looked up to remember the largish pile of clothes that will be getting folded instead.
OH! I also made some all-natural weed killer. Gimme 3 days to see if those suckers die and I’ll post about it. (spoiler alert: Ready Roundup is the devil…)
live well. be well.
