Well.
That didn’t last very long.
Apparently the first Resolution I’ll be breaking this year is my goal of never mentioning The Bachelor or The Bachelorette or Bachelor Pad or any show that looks, sounds or smells like it was bred from the franchise on this site.
Ever.
Not that I don’t appreciate a good Hot Mess. Because you know I do.
And the latest incarnation is just as messy as the 17 seasons that came before it, thanks to Venezuelan Juan Pablo Galavis and his stable of mujeres desesperadas.
That’s right. Español.
You don’t have to be desperately searching for love to use Google Translate, thank you very much. And they did that, you know, as they prepped for their one chance at telenovela-worthy romance.
Not to mention that ‘Loco’ sounds way cooler than ‘Crazy’ when you’re sobbing your way out of a camera shot and losing your nutty in a limousine, right?
But just in case you’ve been otherwise occupied in the Real World, I figured it couldn’t hurt to recycle this classic video one more time and give you a chance to catch up on the last 17 heart breaking, gut wrenching seasons of The Bachelor before you become too emotionally invested all over again this JUAN-uary.
Everything you ever missed in 17 seasons. Ever. In under two minutes.
Literally.
I still think Ben Flajnik said it best.
“I cried a little bit today, I’m not gonna lie.”
El amor es una perra.
Google it.
