In my head, I had already worked out how I would cope with my visit to Zhangjiajie's Tianmen Mountain. I had no idea how that experience would petrify me beyond belief, at the same time I was ready to face my fear of heights. I actually kidded myself, even the cable car ride to the top had me panic stricken! Escalators inside a mountain? Honestly, what was I thinking? Madness!
Leaving Changsha by train that morning was textbook, I was really excited about taking things to 'new heights' but I had no idea how earth-shattering those new found heights would be! No! I was still delusion even after stepping off my high speed train at Zhangjiajie West Railway Station, pure and utter delusion. I didn't know what I was expecting to see at the top of that 'Heaven Gate Mountain' but when I saw the cable car, all kinds of fears entered my head and you already know how my stomach felt! I was full-on questioning my reasons for choosing to visit Zhangjiajie, truly there would be no going back because I hadn't traveled all that way to 'chicken out!' I cannot begin to express the pure fear that engulfed my entire being, the cable car ride had me questioning my life choices, that was after the first five minutes. It was when I saw Zhangjiajie Airport, a new kind of fear kicked in because who needs to see an airports whole layout so clearly? I did not need to and did not find that sight amusing one bit! Oh my days, Z!
My tour guide did not understand how my fear of heights had been transported to a whole new level, I was done with that day out before you could say 'vertigo!' We got higher and I can't deny the view was utterly amazing, I had never witnessed such sights as our cable car ascended further but I was content with that current height anyhow. Half way? I was not impressed I was panicked, I had no time to listen because I was beside my self with every single eventuality, I wanted to be back on the ground! That 'half way' point sent me over the literal edge, my tour guide really thought that I wasn't going to through the trip but I knew that I needed to 'keep it moving' regardless. Little by little, the top of the mountain was in sight and to be honest the misty weather slightly put my mind at ease because the level sickness I was experiencing was enough! What in the world had I got myself into? Honestly, Tianmen Mountain would show me greatness! That cable car did me no wrong, although the safety advice left me shooketh! Truly!
Jumping off that cable car really didn't see me in a good mental space, I questioned those life choices in that moment. My guide had to check me because I was about to lose my mind, I was almost delirious. I had had no explanation about the path, I didn't know which way we would be heading and that did not quell my absolute unshakable panic. My guide told me that we could take two routes, he explained that one would be easier and with my current state we both agreed we needed to get from point to point as quickly as possible! Walking along those walkways made me realize how high the cable car had actually traveled from the station that was at ground level, standing at the top of the mountain at 4,982 ft was a new milestone for me. I had not completely lost my composure but I was close enough, I didn't have time to have a complete breakdown because I had paid too much money! How I appreciated that post-rain mist because it fooled me, I couldn't see past a few metres and that suited me fine. Never again, Zhangjiajie!
My preferred route to reach the show-stopping 'Heaven Gate' would take us down at least twelve escalators inside and down the mountain. I had confronted that 'top of the mountain' view and frankly those escalators sounded like the best thing, I needed to see those promised 99 steps. People were out in their droves, I clung onto every single escalator handrail type of support, I was not playing! I can't begin to express how wild those escalators made me feel because they had been carved inside that mountain situation, I felt very thankful for their presence. Calming my ramped up anxiety for a brief period of time, only then could I process that life choice. No regrets, I had not freaked out like I thought that I would, even my tour guide said to me afterwards that he thought I would be worse. How many more escalators would we need to go down? Oh, when I saw the end of the first section, that's when I honestly thought it was my time to meet Father God! I knew that it was possible, I held on for the next view! Swear to God! Oh!
The light of day returned once again, I couldn't hide from what I was about to see and frankly I had no other choice but to confront it! The actual heavens had gone up and opened before my very eyes, I loved that more than gorgeous view but I don't know how I was able to put one foot in front of the other? Rigor mortis was surely setting in! Heaven had I arrived? I questioned my actual location and how I was standing before such a 'heavenly' view! I did not need to question that moment, it was happening for sure! I had learned how to say 'I'm sorry, I am scared' in Chinese because I wanted to keep it moving but wanted people to know that I wasn't about to be steady on my feet or that I needed to hold onto something. No other words could ever describe how utterly amazing that view looked like in person, I definitely felt that the panic had been worth every moment. I needed those escalators back in my life, I did not want to remain stationary in that maddening queue. Keeping my shit together I did so, I kept my senses intact!
Through the depths of my panic I couldn't deny that the view changed my outlook on life in that moment, it wasn't life changing enough for me to take the photo that is above. I politely asked my guide if he could take that photo because I had no capability during that moment. The queue to reach the next set of escalators didn't impress me because it was madness with some people deciding to rearrange their place in the line. The marshals closed off the mountainside steps to those who were going down the stairs, I had to deal with having nothing to steady myself but my tour guides shoulder helped steady me. My anxiety dipped as I saw those bright lights at the front of the queue, no I hadn't died and gone to heaven in that moment I had only arrived at the start of the final escalators. My stress subsided because I knew that the way down to the bottom of the 'Heaven Gate' wouldn't take as long as the first section. My 'Tianmen Mountain' experience had past the half way point, that alone made me feel relieved. Secretly, I loved it all!
Say that there won't be another one? I was talking about those escalators, I rarely suffer from motion sickness but I was feeling some type of way! With my vertigo I know I am about to sound bonkers but I honestly don't mind looking straight ahead or down a little bit, its when I look up! I couldn't bare to look up as I stood at the foot of Tianmen's own Heaven Gate. I knew that getting a statement photo would have to be done quickly, I didn't have the nerve but also had to navigate around those who were taking their group photos. Thankfully, I was able to take my legendary photo without touching cloth, I had done the most that day! I looked up at the 99 steps and thought to myself how correct it felt to be standing at the bottom of them in that moment. Despite my fears, I made it my mission to complete to days course, for me to not completely freak out had allowed me to finish the route. There was no comparison with that view, I definitely appreciated it all with a sense of gratitude bestowed. One more cable car ride?
In the other direction the view was equally remarkable, it was great to be able to gain two perspectives. I felt incredibly proud of myself, soaking up everything that was around slightly put my mind at ease. Before my visit to Tianmen Mountain, I could only visualise what those 99 steps would look like thought the internet, the open 'gate' rock formation impressed me more than much! Content with my snaps, I politely requested for us to take the cable car down back to 'terra firma' because I was done with those super super heights! Walking from the foot of the gate to the cable car station took about five minutes but with each step it felt longer, I had clocked that the concrete walkway didn't look all that thick. I kept my head in the game, knowing that sooner rather than later I would be making my descend. Clambering into the cable car was borderline traumatic because people clearly had no concept of safety, I did! The initial drop down had my stomach doing somersaults but before I knew it my feet were back on land. Done!
It Was Heaven Sent...
Desperately Seeking Adventure
