It’s 10:23 am. I’ve decided to participate in the WordPress Writing 101: Building a Blogging Habit project in an effort to increase my blog writing, for mental health purposes and to see where this takes me! So here goes!
I’m sitting here in my office alone thinking about the big day. Today marks the day my family and I begin a new journey, the journey of selling our home. I’m feeling kind of sad today. This big, old house I sit in has experienced a lot of life over the 11 years my family and I have lived in it.
As I think about life lived in this house I remember many, many good times. I also remember sad times. What’s wonderful is that our family has gotten through the good and bad times together and in one piece. We remain the family that we have always been, but now we are stronger and ready to move in a new direction.
My son, now a young man, lives on his own and has for the past several years. My youngest daughter, now a young woman, lives on her own, and she has for the past several years as well. My middle daughter, now also a young woman lives with me and my husband. The time seems to be nearing when she too will move out on her own with her little one in tow. Even though I’m excited for all three of my kids to live their lives on their own accord I’m sad too because their absence marks the end to an incredible chapter in my life.
I’m excited about new prospects as we move on. I don’t feel as if the house is mine anymore. It now belongs to someone else. It’s as if I’m taking care of it temporarily until the new owners move in. I see my future right in front of me yet it seems murky. It’s not as clear s it used to be. I used to know where I was going. After graduating from high school I met the man of my dreams. We wed. We started a family. We got our educations. We raised a family. We’ve worked and still work. We now have two granddaughters. They are the sunshine of my life. We now are in the midst of redefining ourselves as a couple. Who are we now? Where are we going now? It seems we are moving away from our adult children. What has happened? I thought it was supposed to be the other way around. I thought that children grew up and left home. What is this strange place I mind myself? I feel lost yet right on track. It’s an odd feeling. I’m older now. Wrinkles now grace my face. Painful joints now highlights my days. Pain medications as well as supplements seem to be a permanent part of the picture now.
I have nine minutes left to free write. My brain seems to take a break. What is it that I want to write about? I seem to have a lot of questions swirling around in my mind. Where am I headed? I know that deep in my soul I want to be a published writer. I know that deep in my soul that I want to help others. I know that deep in my soul that I want to be right next to my husband as we continue to journey forward in this crazy life. I know that I want my family to be close yet for everyone to experience their own independence. How do we do that though? This is going to be a learning process for me. I know that I can do it. I have the best teachers: my husband, my kids, my granddaughters, my parents, my extended family, my friends…
For some reason I seem to look at the clock on my computer. Now I have six minutes left to write. I’m wondering if I wrote the word “six” correctly. When do we write a number as a word as opposed to just writing out the numerals? I’ll have to check my handy dandy grammar and punctuation book. Speaking of books, I miss taking classes. I miss learning. I’m excited for the potential to once again be working in a job where I am making a difference.
In closing, I would like to thank the WordPress Blog Team for coming up with the idea of blogging for the next twenty days theme. As busy as I will be selling this old house I plan on sitting down and writing a blog post each day for the next twenty days. I look forward to each new writing prompt from the blog team! As I end this blog entry for today I imagine myself in a new, sunny, warm place with ocean waves slapping up against the seashore. I imagine my kids and grand-kids visiting me at our new place on Earth. I imagine them running alone the shore and picking up seashells. I imagine the grand sandcastles that they will build. I imagine many more sunshine moments to come, and I’m ready!
