Lifestyle Magazine

What a Day! *Phew*

By Bewilderedbug @bewilderedbug

Today was definitely one for the books, it started off bad and ended just as badly….

To celebrate, I decided I was going to tell you about my pet peeves for this week. I’d love to hear if you find this a problem as well….

So, onto my list!

1) Bright Headlights

Since we switched over to Daylight Savings Time on Sunday I have been driving home in pitch black darkness, and the dreary, rainy weather we have been having in Toronto recently does not help anything. I always drive in rush hour traffic. I’m one of those poor souls that you point at and laugh at sitting on the 401 daily as you fly by in your comfy seat on the GO or VIA trains. Or even the not-so-comfy seats of the TTC train. I sit in bumper to bumper traffic on the way to work and have perfected the art of squeezing in and changing lanes to make my drive a little more stressful shorter. On the way home, though, there’s no space for even an ant to squeeze through – you just have to sit in it. So now I sit in it, in the dark. And this week in the wet dark that reflects headlights, oh so well. So please tell me, dear idiots surrounding me daily on the 401, why do you insist on sitting in bumper to bumper traffic with your high beams on?! Do YOU like having a flashlight shone directly in your face?

2) People who don’t know how to drive

Okay, so I am an impatient driver – I will be the first one to admit that patience is a virtue I do not possess. So if you are in bumper to bumper slow traffic and you decide to put three truckloads of space between yourself and the car in front of you, and I’m stuck behind you…I get pissed off. You’ve just wasted valuable space. If you insist like driving like a old woman or man who recently lost their license, move your tail over to the slow lane so I can get home. Please. At the same time, if you are sixteen and recently got a license and have Daddy’s sportscar for the day and are trying to impress the girl in your front seat, please realize that if you lie down while driving you can’t see over the steering wheel. That’s dangerous. And lying down while driving like a maniac in rush hour traffic (for example coming right up on my bumper, tempting me to slam on the brakes) is dangerous too. Grow up.

3) Stupid Man Driver this Morning

Okay so this is a really specific one. I live at along Yonge Street and take back roads to the 401 in the morning. This morning I was driving – and I was actually in a really good mood when I woke up – down this back road behind this guy who was just a little too slow for me so I decided to overtake in the left lane. He was driving one of those SUV’s with windows so tinted you swear he had illegal prostitutes drugged up and tied down in the back of his car. Okay so that was a bit much, but I just wanted to stress that his windows were so dark I couldn’t see through them, his car so high and wide I couldn’t see around it. So I check my mirrors, look behind me, signal and pull into the left lane of the two lane street. I was just about to pass him when he suddenly puts on HIS indicator (gee, one point for him) and pulls in right in front of me. Seriously, I may have just entered his blind spot. What happened was that there was a car parked in the lane he was in and he was avoiding it…by trying to plow into me. So I decided to do as the hubby does and leaned on my horn. But he kept coming – I actually saw him look in his mirror and ignore the fact that the back of his car was in line with my front tire – and forced me to my left into oncoming traffic. Then he went on his merry way – I could not believe it. And it was on my mind all the way to work, no matter how hard I tried to let it go.

I don’t think it was the near accident that upset me as much as the “Oh she’s a woman driver” attitude. Yes, I am a woman. Yes I am a driver. That does not mean that I should be walked all over, be considered someone to take for granted or that I should back down in this type of situation – ESPECIALLY when I am in the right! Are you listening you males out there?! I promise you, with everyday I have to drive on that fricking highway, my road rage increases. It’s only a matter of time that one of you take me for granted and I follow you home and go postal (okay not really…but I can dream). Can you imagine the hubby getting a phone call from jail to come get his wife?!

4) Changing Twitter names and avatars

Okay so this isn’t so serious, it just makes me so confused. And no, person I spoke to about this, you did not prompt this – okay maybe you did a little, but you were the third person in the last two weeks who has changed your name. I’ll tell you what this does to me (and this is strictly personal). Remember my husband is not here. My apartment is empty. I have been diagnosed with clinical depression. I am really, really lonely, and tend to live vicariously through you tweeps. When you change your name and your avatars as often as I change my socks (okay so I’m exaggerating), I don’t recognize you, and recently, I haven’t been on lately to realize that you’ve changed your name and/or avatar… I feel like everyone else has such a great life IRL except me who is sitting on Twitter, pretty much Twitter stalking and getting more and more down and more and more lonely because all you great tweeps are “missing” (when really all you’ve done is change your name and/or av). Yes that was a completely selfish entry in this list. Yes I realize that I have no right to tell you what to keep and not keep on your social media profiles and yes, I am feeling sorry for myself, but today is that kinda day ….

5) The desire to go back to my blogger blog and my blogger stats

I’ve been applying for opps for my reviews and giveaways (yes, for those of you who don’t know I have to approach companies/brands and convince them to work with me on my blog in order to offer you awesome giveaways….they don’t somehow just discover me), and have been getting less and less. The reason why? Since I moved to WordPress, I lost over 5000 followers a month. And yes, I haven’t been on much lately because I’ve been dealing with some unhealthy emotions going on over here in this apartment, but I have had guest bloggers who have some amazing things to say. My monthly views, after checking today, are at an all time low…okay not all time, but a long time…it’s lower than it has been since my blog was maybe a month old on blogger? Yes, I love that I switched because this platform has so many more options (most of which I have yet to discover), but I want my blogger stats back.

I also know that when I moved over, I changed the direction of my blog. If you don’t like what I’m doing, or would like to see more or less of a type of post, please do feel free to communicate with me. I like interacting with you, if I was a hermit, I wouldn’t have the blog…so if you have an opinion, please do put it in the comments below…I’m trying to improve, and the only way I can do that is if you help me improve….what would you like to see on/with this blog?

6) In general, the desire to go back in time

Yeah, going back to single digit ages just to go on weekly trips to KFC or to swimming lessons may be a bit much – but it would be nice to go back in time to when I didn’t have so much to THINK about. Or maybe, just go back in time to when I didn’t think this MUCH. My husband always tell me I over-think things. The problem now is that with him not here, I guess I’m overthinking EVERYTHING because he used to be my buffer….and now that buffer is far away :S Maybe that’s what the recent slight anxiety attacks I’ve been getting are.

7) Crazy people at work trying to get me fired.

OMG do I need to say more? I’m the low person on the totem pole at work. And I guess in some circles, “low person on the totem pole” = “Scapegoat Majore” Apparently if I stay home for one day because I’m sick, the project is behind by 3 months. All my fault because one shop drawing didn’t get processed the moment it arrived in my inbox. The fact that it’s due two weeks later has nothing to do with it. That being said, after discussing it a few weeks ago and chickening out when I went to quit, my contract is up in December. We’ll see what happens with that. Just playing with my options in my head (ooh overthinking. Maybe I should sleep on it. See? Luv Luv does rub off on me.)

8 ) Societal and Educational Discrimination can go both ways

A friend posted something on facebook about my alma mater. I went to one of the top rated schools in Trinidad – she didn’t. One of their friends (in jest) put a comment putting the school down and I flipped out. Maybe it’s my mood recently, maybe it’s because since I was in the school, idiots have been making comments, or maybe I’m overly-sensitive about (this type) of discrimination. I grew up in w hat I consider to be a very privileged lifestyle, yet I was taught never to judge people by their status in society, how much money they had, what car t hey drove IF they drove a car, what they looked like, what they weighted, what school they attended or even sometimes what morals they upheld…..(okay, so the last one is up for discussion).

When people read this, I assume (sorry I know that’s making an ass of you and me) that you think that I mean this type of discrimination to people who are at an “inferior (for the want of a better word) position than I am in. Yes, I guess that’s what I mean, but I also know what it feels like to have that prejudice the other way – and I’ve been a victim of that often. People who have not been as privileged as me immediately assume that I’m a stuck up little b*tch that has no life experience, has always had it easy and who has not experienced anything bad in her life. Thanks guys for stereotyping me – and I guarantee you that I do not fall into that stereotype at all. I am the first to admit I live a privileged life. I’m the first to admit I was spoilt when I was growing up and am a bit spoilt now.

Okay, so maybe it does boil down to jealousy – maybe you’re jealous that I have and have had what I have and what I have had. But have you ever thought of becoming friends with me, getting to know me, actually learning what I’m about before you decide that because you’re jealous you’re going to bad mouth me, or aspects of my life? Isn’t that as bad as me looking at you and considering you a poor, grubby, uneducated, crass country bumpkin? (sorry that was a jab…)

and last but not least 9)Skype Arguments.

And today ended with me talking to the Luv Luv and arguing. Skype arguements are possibly the worst kind – because there is no physicality there, so no matter what you say, it just seems….distant…uncaring….worthless even. And it leaves you feeling like crap….I’m still trying to figure this long distance thing out, but one thing I know for sure is that when it comes to hot topics like money, insurance, my job….we’ve been arguing and we have to figure that out. I feel like he tries to give me advice without knowing the whole situation and that he doesn’t want to know the whole situation…..I guess when we were together he’d know the events as it happened, but a Skype call once every two days for an hour or two, just cannot replace the time you spend together when you are a couple within physical reach of each other.

Yes I sound like a spoilt brat – at least I have Skype….I can’t imagine how people did this when there was no such thing as video calling….or when there was no such thing as overseas phone lines…. I really need advice on this and I really need to figure this out from my side at least…it frustrates me that the little time I see him, we end up spending in an argument.


So that was my (not-so) little rant for the day. This will not be a frequent thing, I promise (I think).

How was your day? How was your week? What have been annoying you this week?!

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