I was looking on various Thailand blogs and noticing some of the cringe worthy stuff about certain tourist places to visit. Site after site recommending this place and that, to which I was react with the following expression:
Anyway here are my list of top 5 places not to visit in Bangkok.
Koh San road
Think of all the personalities traits you hate in the world, mix in a few chavvy Brits, some ozzie bogans and of course the French, and you have Koh San Road. Koh San road is a long strip , full of trashpackers being too loud, drinking out of buckets. It is as if each and every person on that road wants me to come along and just punch each and every one of them in the face, repeatedly. Its pretty much a tourist trap, remove all the tourists and that street would cease to make any money.
I have sent several emails to the NSA and CIA about sending in a couple of drones to bomb this place, I’m sure the people will not be missed, but no reply as of yet.
Chatuchak market
Another place that every tour guide book recommends, why I don’t know. First of all its way to far from anything else. Whenever you are there its way to hot and packed with the same people who “enjoy Koh san road” so much. 95% of the shops sell the same stuff you can find in almost any other night market in Bangkok or Thailand. Its dubbed to be cheap, but Boe Bae and Pratunam markets are much cheaper, and better.
After the first 20 meters you have completed Chatuchak market, because it just repeats it self over and over and over and over and over again. I must confess I have visited this place twice. The first time I left within 5 minutes. The second time I punished myself for not learning my lesson the first time and forced myself to spend 1 hour there. Worst. Day. Ever.
Sukhumvit Soi 11
Soi 11 is a hit and miss, I mean sure the 500 baht special messages they offer half up the Soi are great, the after hours Climax is good too (I guess?). However the fact that the street is packed with a 1001 tourists, most of whom are coming straight from Koh San Road, drinking at Cheap Charles because some guide book mentioned it too them.
Q bar and the now closed Bed Supper Club are way too pretentious and overpriced. Taxis and tuk tuk shouting at you to get in for “peng phang show” or something else. The Soi has a few nice things about it, but other than that I would stay away. I’m a bit undecided on this as Levels is pretty good too, but ill leave it in the list for now.
Bangkok Floating markets
I won’t lie, I have never visited the floating markets yet I am telling you not to visit, first of all, welcome to the internet, where people give advice on things they haven’t even seen. Secondly if I haven’t visited a place in Bangkok, it just means that it’s not worth visiting.
You have to wake up early in the morning to see it, catch a 2 hour taxi or mini bus to the markets and back, no thanks Jeff. If you havent already been ripped off on the journey there, don’t worry you at the market! I would rather spend my morning walking back with a bar girl from Insomnia than getting ripped off by the floating markets at 7am in the morning. These are the same floating markets that would most likely never be there if it wasn’t for the flock of Lonely Planet tourist who visit daily.
The Tiger temple
Not sure this one really needs to be explained too much, paying money to see fake monks trying to take money off you. Petting and taking pictures with tigers that are drugged docile everyday for your pleasure. That’s not something I really want to be apart of, but it does make a good Facebook profile photo for a lot of people. And yup, I know this is not technically in Bangkok.
What do you think? Leave a comment and I will get back to you. Next week I will suggest the “top 5 places in Bangkok” to visit as an alternative to the above.
