Debate Magazine

THIS is What We Don't Need Government at Any Level Legislating

Posted on the 27 January 2012 by Mikeb302000
There is a long list of stupid laws which SHOULD make us scofflaws.  Laws like the one that makes it illegal to put an ice cream cone upside down in your pocket.  Laws that really are intrusive, and improperly limit freedom instead of dealing with serious issues that actually involve one person seriously intruding on another.
Laws like this proposed ordinance about pajamas.  It gets hot in Louisiana; we should be happy if people even wear pajamas in Louisiana.
So I started looking up strange laws, laws which like this proposed ordinance about pajamas, came into existence because somebody got upset about the subject once-upon-a-time, rightly or wrongly.
The London Times compiled a list of 25 strangest laws, back in August 2007.
25. It is illegal for a cab in the City of London to carry rabid dogs or corpses.
24. It is illegal to die in the Britain Houses of Parliament.
23. It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British monarch upside down.
22. In France, it is forbidden to call a pig Napoleon.
21. Under the U.K.’s Tax Avoidance Schemes Regulations 2006, it is illegal not to tell the taxman anything you don’t want him to know, though you don’t have to tell him anything you don’t mind him knowing.
20. In Alabama, it is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while driving a vehicle.
19. In Ohio, it is against state law to get a fish drunk.
18. Royal Navy ships that enter the Port of London must provide a barrel of rum to the Constable of the Tower of London.
17. In the U.K., a pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants — even, if she so requests, in a policeman’s helmet.
16. In Lancashire, no person is permitted after being asked to stop by a constable on the seashore to incite a dog to bark.
15. In Miami, Fla., it is illegal to skateboard in a police station.
14. In Indonesia, the penalty for masturbation is decapitation.
13. In England, all men over the age of 14 must carry out two hours of longbow practice a day.
12. In London, Freemen are allowed to take a flock of sheep across London Bridge without being charged a toll; they are also allowed to drive geese down Cheapside.
11. In San Salvador, drunk drivers can be punished by death before a firing squad.
10. In the U.K., a man who feels compelled to urinate in public can do so only if he aims for his rear wheel and keeps his right hand on his vehicle.
9. In Florida, unmarried women who parachute on Sundays can be jailed.
8. In Kentucky, it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon more than six-feet long.
7. In Chester, England, Welshmen are banned from entering the city before sunrise and from staying after sunset.
6. In the city of York, it is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow.
5. In Boulder, Colo., it is illegal to kill a bird within the city limits and also to “own” a pet — the town’s citizens, legally speaking, are merely “pet minders."
4. In Vermont, women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.
3. In London, it is illegal to flag down a taxi if you have the plague.
2. In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman’s genitals but is forbidden from looking directly at them during the examination; he may only see their reflection in a mirror.
1. The head of any dead whale found on the British coast is legally the property of the king; the tail, on the other hand, belongs to the queen — in case she needs the bones for her corset.
On that last one......who owns the middle of the whale?  And if the queen DOESN'T want the whale tail bones for a corset, or the king - when there is one - doesn't want the head, do THEY have to pay for the whale's removal?
There is a web site which has 'strange but true' laws alphabetized by state, although unlike the London Times, I don't know how factual they are.  I was looking for the law about ice cream cones and pockets, but came across a few which surprised me, two in particular that apply to content here.
(I'd bet the one for Kennesaw GA pertains to militas; maybe Laci will look it up for me):
• Acworth: All citizens must own a rake.
• An old law in Columbus, Ga., made it illegal to sit on your porch in an indecent position.

• A Kennesaw, Ga. law makes it illegal for every homeowner not to own a gun, unless you are a convicted felon, conscientious objector or disabled.
• Atlanta: Against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp;

• Columbus: Can't cut off a chicken's head on Sunday; It is illegal to carry a chicken by it's feet down Broadway on Sunday.
• Donkeys may not be kept in bathtubs.
• Gainesville: Chicken must be eaten with the hands.
• Georgia has 75 laws on how to build rice paddies, even though the state has only one rice farm left. Rice was the state's No. 1 crop before the Civil War. But right after the war, a hurricane destroyed all the paddies and ponds. It was too expensive to replace them without slaves, so the Rice State began growing peaches, peanuts and other crops.
• Georgia officials were revising their state laws in 1981, and noticed they still allowed pensions for Confederate widows. That week the last widow died. Lawmakers bowed their heads, and deleted the law.
• In Georgia, movie houses that want to show films on Sunday must reserve one showing a month for religious material. 
• In Quitman, It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
• It is illegal to change the clothes on a storefront mannequin unless the shades are down.
• It is illegal to say "Oh, Boy" in Jonesboro.
• It is illegal to take a bath of orange peel.
• It is illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body which lies in a funeral home or in a coroners office.
• It used to be against the law in Jonesboro, Ga., to utter the words, "Oh boy."
• Marietta: Though it is illegal to spit from a car or bus, citizens may spit from a truck.
• Members of the state assembly cannot be ticketed for speeding while the state assembly is in session.
• No one may carry an ice cream cone in their back pocket if it is Sunday.
• Signs are required to be written in English.
• St. Mary's: No spitting on the sidewalk is permitted after dark.

• You have the right to commit simple battery if provoked by "fighting" words. 
Just my 2 cents but I think it would in fact be a worthwhile use of our limited funds to get rid of those laws - like all of the ones above - that really are obsolete (like civil war pensions) and clearly silly.

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