Expat Magazine

The Things Girls Do

By Expatmum @tonihargis
So, a few posts ago, I wrote about the things boys do. Given as I also have a daughter (who reads this blog), I thought it only fair to write about the things girls do. I think boys get a bad wrap (or is that rap?), or at least girls are credited with the "sugar and spice" thing when it's not always warranted.
She moved into her own little bed when her brother came along and needed the cot/crib. She was two years, nine months at the time, and still napping in the afternoon. "Bliss" I thought, "They can nap at the same time and I'll get the laundry done", but the petite Queenager had other thoughts and kept getting out of the little bed. (Hint to mothers, - when they start doing this, it's time to phase out the afternoon nap, no matter how much it kills you.) I continued to put her to bed anyway, hoping against hope that she might sleep.
Finding her stripped off and covered in white zinc nappy/diaper cream was a bit of a hint that I should really give up on the nap idea. A few days later my fate was sealed when I went into the bedroom to find a veritable snow scene and the Queenager happily sitting in the middle of it. Took me a few minutes to figure out that she'd undone the two "safety" zippers of a bean bag and emptied the entire contents, mostly into her underwear drawer. I swear I was picking tiny polystyrene balls from her knickers for years.
About a month later, we were walking to the park at the end of our street. I glanced down and noticed something sparkly on her thumb. "What's that you have?" I asked. "Oh, something I found", she replied, not meeting my gaze. Only my bloody brand new Tiffany eternity/anniversary ring that I had taken off and left by the bathroom sink!
The Things Girls Do
When she was about twelve, I was in her room and could smell the most awful pong. Having once found a dead mouse in a laundry basket (don't ask) I knew the smell could literally be something rotting so I set about to find it. Sniffed the rug and decided it had been wee'd and puked on too many times, so out it went. Smell still there. Went through every single pocket of every single piece of clothing in her closet. Nothing. Smell still there. Every drawer was turned out, the bed searched, - nothing. Smell still there.
Now I was on a mission. Nothing gets passed this nose. I finally followed the smell back into her closet and decided to stay in there till I found it, despite the fact that the aroma was making my eyes water.
And yes, I found it. That would be the four month old ham and cheese sandwich tucked away in a lunch bag on the top shelf. Why it was there I have no idea. She probably thought she'd get into trouble for not eating her lunch so decided to hide it. As you do.
I made her open the lunch bag and get rid of the offending item though, so I don't think she'll be doing that again!

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