Rule# 1 here
Rule# 2 here
Rule #3 here
Rule #4 here
Forget all the rules for a second and let’s address the elephant in the room. I received a very thought-provoking comment from Skinny And Me
I think casual relationships are difficult because relationships whether they be friendships, love, work, whatever the case, are not casual in nature. I mean do you have a casual best friend? No you have acquaintances, you know exactly what to expect from these people. But casual relationships blur the line. It becomes difficult to distinguish what you can and can not ask of the person.
Which leads me to this: What the hell is a ‘casual’ relationship anyway?
Is it
- A Friends-with-Benefits arrangement?
- A bunch of dinner and movie dates minus the empty promises?
- A No-BS-let’s-hook-up-only scenario?
- An in-between relationship before the ‘right’ person comes along?
- A manifestation of fear of commitment, disguised in a seemingly aloof affair?
Or is it simply what you choose to call it, for lack of a better term?
I’m not here to try and define what a casual relationship is, or force you to accept a certain interpretation of it.
A casual relationship is whatever you choose it to be. There is a reason you call it ‘casual’, and you know that reason better than anyone else.
So, rule#5 is really simple : Know your reason
Once you know your reason for being in a casual relationship, you’ll know whether not you’re getting what you want out of it.
If you are, then congratulations, you’ve cracked the casual dating code.
If not, then you know it’s time to let go.
As for me, I think my dear friend S sums it up best:
“I think there is nothing called a casual relationship. What you have with this guy only falters in a way that it’s not ‘exclusive’. But it cannot be casual. I’m sure in many ways you touch each other’s hearts deep down and bring joy and sorrow. It’s the new 21st century meaningful relationship. I’m sure you love him and he loves you in many ways and the love does not cover certain norms. It’s the french fry you don’t have all the time but it’s the fry you’ve enjoyed the most till now.“
