Entertainment Magazine
A film by Penfold.
Episode 6: 2009 – Present Day
Previously, we explored the rich history of The House Harkonnen. Thanks to the scarcity of true first-hand accounts, the House’s covert formation in 2003 has remained a mystery to much of the world. Historians only agreed on the 2003 formation date due to that being the origin year displayed on honorific patches worn by all House members. 2004 proved to be the year the House went public, actively promoting its ideals and endeavors in ever expanding circles of influence. In this episode, we pick up the history towards the end of 2009.
Countries around the globe were descending into chaos. Tumultuous protests were occurring on an almost weekly basis. Some of these protests lasted only hours before they were forcibly broken up. Others amassed so many people that they could not be stopped, lasting for several days before the crowds dispersed. Trained observers noted that the only thing holding back massive societal change was the lack of a unifying leader who could bring these disparate protesters together. Essentially, the world was a powder keg primed and ready to explode.
The House Harkonnen had bided its time until it was absolutely convinced its efforts would result in success. On October 15th, 2009 the four leaders of the House emerged from their lair, a modified lighthouse located in Silo Town, U.S.A., and traveled to central points on the continents of Africa, Asia, Europe, and South America. Electronic and physical pamphlets had been liberally dispersed among the population centers of these continents prior to the House leaders’ arrival. This being the case, each leader was able to instantly connect with an army of eager converts ready to do their bidding.
According to plan, the House leaders spent a week and a half sermonizing how the priorities of The House Harkonnen mirrored those of the common man. New influxes of supporters streamed into House controlled campsites daily. It is estimated that the amount of supporters eventually numbered around 300,000 per House leader. Understandably, the local governments began to fear the power wielded by these four outsiders. They sent envoys in order to gauge the House leaders’ intentions. All of these couriers were sent back with the same response. It stated ‘We, The House Harkonnen, have come to your land to take over. If you don’t like it, that’s tough fucking news’. Cut and dried to say the least.
A few of the nearby politicians took the House’s statement of intent seriously, but most met their words with laughter and scorn. Unfortunately for them they were not aware of the secret weapon that House archeologists had unearthed back in the United States. Exactly one year prior those archeologists found a sealed urn buried deep underground. Inside that urn was a knife. It appeared plain and unvarnished. The only distinguishing element to the knife appeared to be some indecipherable text along the knife’s hilt. Detailed examination revealed that this knife was actually the famed ‘blade to take the world’. Historical precedent established that whoever possessed this fabled blade was destined to rule over everyone and everything.
Pity the world’s former powers. Praise The House Harkonnen.
Look waveriders. I know what you’re thinking. You’ve had yourself a nice, pleasant little run. Happiness and good fortune have proven reliable companions lately. During this time you’ve become enamored with some light and airy, poppy tunes that perfectly complement your current mind state. But wait. Hold on a moment. I also hear what that prophetic inner voice is whispering to you from the shadows. It’s foretelling that these good times can’t last. Pretty soon, you’re going to fall back to earth and need to listen to something merciless; something that takes no prisoners in its relentless effort to rock your socks off! It’s inevitable. And when that happens The House Harkonnen will be there, ready to bring the hammer down.
It appears that the state of Texas has another secret to tell. What may seem strange to some people is that this secret doesn’t call Austin home. The House Harkonnen is a self described ‘slop rock’ band that hails from Arlington, a large city inside the Dallas/Fort Worth metroplex. The band has been plying their trade since the early years of the new millennium. In that time they have released six slabs of scathing rock upon the masses (although I can personally vouch for only four of those six slabs, I’m going to give them the benefit of the doubt on the remaining two), appropriately titled Volume 1 through 6. Volume 6, the newest to be released into the wild back in October of 2009, is the focus of our attention today.
There is no way around it people. Volume 6 is an absolute monster! It’s beastly! This album does more to rock my world during its half hour running length than most anything I’ve come across in recent memory. After a brief muscle flexing wall of heavy guitar tonality provides the proper introduction, the band mashes on the accelerator and never lets up. Honestly, this album…it completes me. So what kind of sonic template am I talking about exactly? What does this ‘slop rock’ sound like? Allow me to provide some insight.
First of all you have dueling guitars mounting a riff based assault upon your senses. The guitars are inescapable! They fill any void with a deep, rich, aggressive sound all the while in powerful harmony with one another. Second, the bass and drums lay down an incredibly thick, meaty groove on every song in perfect lockstep. Seriously, the propulsion they provide should come with a warning indicator about possible radiation exposure. Last but not least we have the vocals. During the majority of Volume 6 the vocals are very hardcore-ish in nature. They exhibit a primal urgency that connects deeply with any soul seeking honest, genuine emotion from their singers. To top that off, there is plenty of vocal variety on offer throughout the album. As stated you have the hardcore stuff, but there are also songs with clean singing, and others mixing the two approaches.
I could easily break down every song on this album. In truth, I would do so happily! Now let me explain why I’m not going to do that. It’s very simple. I don’t feel that my writing can do this music justice. Reading about tunes like these is all well and good, but actually hearing them will be far more impressive. Consider this a challenge waveriders; from me to you. Point your browser over to The House Harkonnen’s website (www.thehouseharkonnen.com), click on the audio tab, start the player, and let Volume 6 energize you. To sum up, if you listen to “A Blade To Take The World” and remain calm and unaffected, you need to seek emergency medical assistance. Something is dreadfully wrong!
--Penfold
Buy here: Vol. 6