Now this is a big project and I am not going to detail here as I am still mid-way through, the purpose of this tale is is concerning what I found mid-ivy-removal. This tree was very covered in ivy, it was basically an ivy mound. It had always been covered in ivy from when I first moved into the house and whilst I had half-heartedly tried to remove it previously I had never made much headway. This time I was on a mission, I cut and hacked, hacked and cut and the shape of the tree started to re-appear. The shape included a bulge. I thought the bulge a little odd and continued hacking.Then it appeared, the edge of something crafted from wood. I thought (hoped) it might be a bird-box so I continued with even more focus. After a short while it was uncovered and it was indeed an old, wood-worm ridden, rotten bird box. In the seven years I have lived here I had never seen it before, it had always been completed covered in ivy. I had no inkling it was there. I cleared it further and a massive chunky black spider ran out of it. I managed not to fall off the step-ladder (just) and decided to leave it alone for now.
I posted a picture of it on twitter (as you do) and someone commented that it looked like the entrance into Mordor. I thought about the big black spider and could only agree.I look at the tree as I stand by the kitchen sink, I kept looking at the bird box and it ominously kept looking back. It disturbed me. After a whole day of this I decided it had to be dealt with, so standing at a distance I knocked the bird-box off the tree, it was so rotten it fell very easily and I stuck it on the compost heap.
A day or so later my daughter came to visit, I was proudly showing her the ivy-removed tree and she commented 'oh the one with the haunted bird-box'. I then knew I had done the right thing in removing it........
..... or have I? I have read enough M R James ghost stories to know that removing things and unleashing things is rarely a good move. Now where is that spider..........
