Dating Magazine

The Bachelor Returns/rebounds/ Repeats/reruns?

By Datecoachtoni @CoachToni

For all of you who have been watching the latest season of The Bachelor- you may have noticed the way the show has worked hard to showcase Brad as a changed man, ready for commitment and marriage after undergoing counseling following his first season on the show. I don’t question Brad’s sincerity and desire for commitment; however, I’ve seen some of the old Brad coming out- have you?

If you listen closely to what Brad says on his mini interviews that are shown several times during each weekly installment, you will hear his thoughts on the women, his dates with them and his assessment of how well they fit with him. He has shown very high interest in several who did not make the cut. The reasons for some of his choices seem to be rooted in the old Brad’s way of thinking. Yes, he is very drawn to them and can see himself being married to them, but…

Some of the reasons he gives include ones like; “I just don’t feel enough beyond friendship,” or “when you said you loved me, I just didn’t feel that comfortable and couldn’t respond the same way.” These are very solid reasons. Then there were the scenes like the one with Emily where Brad was unable to kiss her because her daughter was asleep upstairs; or when he was so into Shawntel until he actually experienced what she did for a living. She was even willing to give it up for him, but he could not handle his feelings about death and dying.

Yes, we all have “hang-ups” that can have a negative impact on our life and relationships. However, Brad appears to be looking for a woman who meets his IDEAL of what he wants in a mate. No imperfections, issues, differences to work through.
Just in case you may be thinking that I am being overly hard on Brad, I want to point out that three years ago I was one of the few people defending Brad’s choice not to choose. Clearly he knew he wasn’t ready and believed if he didn’t feel what was necessary, it would be unfair to everyone concerned to go along for the sake of the show. It took guts, and was the right thing to do.

Now, Brad has another chance after doing some hard work on himself. He wants a relationship like his brothers have, with all the things that go along with it. But, is he really ready for the “in sickness and health, through richer or poorer, till death do us part” part. I get the sense he wants guarantees (don’t we all) and unless he can find someone who is PERFECT Brad may end up alone and holding tightly onto that rose.


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