Wait long enough, and there she is. You see that?
Twelve o’clock, as my dad likes to say, right there in front of
you. It’s 28 degrees outside – four degrees
cooler than required to, say, generate your own, artisanal ice – and she’s got
short sleeves.
At this time of year, you know, you don’t see many short sleeves
on the bus.
And that’s because they are under layers upon layers of
rich, satisfying fabric.
Fabric! Nature’s
way of saying, You, over there! I shall award your foresight in covering
yourself with one more day of life.
She boards the bus, tight jeans, leather boots, a
short-sleeved tee and a fashionably slouch-y wool cap. Practically embryonic with youth, her pink
face flush with color – perhaps fever related – she and a friend search for a
seat while those of us of a more practical bent view her with hooded, content
eyes.
We are warm, and she is not.
Take that,
adorably shivering female.
Somewhere in my head, of course, in a corner I reserve for
random, spiteful thoughts, I am hoping that the bus will break down and that,
partially frozen and struggling toward an awaiting bus blocks and blocks away –
perhaps to be warmed and presented with complimentary firefighters and
squirming, squealing puppies – she will fall, her smooth-soled footwear failing
her, to come up dripping with salt-laden slush.
Tearfully, she will proclaim, “I’ve been so foolish! I will never, ever dress without regard to
weather conditions again!”
You know. Like I
did.
Every day, of course, I am proven wrong in one form or
another, and today is yet another example of this winning streak. Tiny, frozen female does not actually freeze,
and there are no complimentary firefighters waiting at the end of the line offering
to throw me over a thick, uniformed shoulder.
Perhaps I am riding the wrong bus?