Jon Birger, freelance writer and the author of DATE-ONOMICS: How Dating became a Lopsided Numbers Game, has written an interesting piece on how there is a shortage of college-aged men, and how this is leading to a problem for women seeking single, compatible men for dating and more.
Mr. Birger talks about the theories that have gone around as to what has led to the hook-up culture and a basic dissatisfaction on the part of women with dating. He puts forth a great counter-argument to the one that blames dating apps for creating this problem.
According to Birger it’s all about demographics, or in other words, it’s a numbers game, and it doesn’t favor women. He draws on other times in history during and after world wars when men were a scarcity and women often made unhappy compromises just to be with one. Nowadays it’s a shifting in the demographics of those in the post-college dating pool—there are fewer college educated men for college educated women to choose from.
In 2012, there were 34% more straight women college graduates then men, and this is expected to continue rising. The sheer numbers can give you pause—5.5 million college educated women in the US between the ages of 22 and 29, VS 4.1 men who fit these same demographics. That’s a difference of 1.4 million, yikes. Talk about kids in a candy store, college educated men have their easy pick and probably feel no rush to settle down with just one woman.
Birger makes the case that when there are plenty of marriageable men, dating emphasizes courtship and marriage. But when men are scarce, the culture leans towards more casual, hook-up dating. Birger also makes the point that if women became more open to dating men who don’t have a college degree, these numbers would improve for them. He recommends women not put off looking for love as this gets worse as they get older.
I’m seeing this already in couples I work with and in many cases, the education difference doesn’t overshadow their success if their goals, values, intellectual stimulation and friendship are in sync and well-balanced. Something to think about ladies.
It’s a different situation for gay and lesbian daters and Birger does discuss this as well. If you are in that group, I suggest you check out his piece. It’s also a better numbers game for women out west than in the large eastern cities like New York and D.C.
