Being an English teacher in Korea can be a thankless job. The hours are long, vacation is short and cultural boundaries can be intimidating and annoying. But the thing that keeps me teaching are the students. Watching them progress is rewarding, but they also provide ample entertainment in the classroom. Here are my favorite stories!
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1. I was teaching a class of middle schoolers. One of them absolutely loved attention and constantly disrupted the class to get attention. I told him, “If you’re going to act like you’re in kindergarten, you can sit on the floor like in kindergarten.” So, he sat on the floor for the rest of the lesson and quietened down. At the end, when I gave him permission to stand up, he stretched up, then started rubbing his rear, and said, “Teacher! My ass!”Other disruptions included, “Teacher! He said he cut my pen-is!” and “Teacher, what does ‘wasted’ mean?” He was never boring.
2. I got engaged and had a nice diamond ring to prove it. Often, my partner would pick me up outside the school. One of my other middle school students proceeded to say, “Oh! Teacher, boyfriend handsome!” then held my hand and slid my ring off, then wore it herself. I pretended I was going to fight her then took the ring back.
3. The fifth graders were learning body parts, and the expression, “I hurt my [body part].” When students were lining up to leave, one of the boys walked around to each student, pointed to his crotch and thrust, then said, “I hurt my penis! I hurt my penis! I hurt my penis!”
4. For some ridiculous reason, a middle schooler thought it would be a great idea to bring her 3 tiny pet fish to school in a water bottle. I put it to the side on my desk. Two of the students started play fighting then fell onto the bottle, breaking it apart and suddenly there were three flapping, traumatized fish on the floor and a bunch of screaming middle schoolers. I had to pick up the little things and place them in the remains of the water bottle.
5. And last, but not least, one of the most adorable students I had was a chubby cheeked first grader. She told me about her pet hamster named, “Pudding-ee!” I confirmed with her, “Pudding-y?” and she replied, “No, no, no, teacher… Pudding… EEEEEEEEEEEE!”
These moments are what make teaching worth it, for me. What are your stories?
