Do you have to have first hand experience to be called an expert?I mean, I had teachers in engineering who had never been an 'engineer' but they were the best in the department.
Some great pediatricians never had a child, and we still trust them with our child's care.
There are political analysts who were never politicians, yet they help shape a nation with their thoughts.
Do we consider them experts, even if they do not 'do'? And if not, does that mean they are not entitled to their own opinion nor allowed to give their own piece of mind? Do we just block them off as fakes or posers?
I started this post as a quick Facebook status. Then again, I realized I have a few more things to say. And I want it here in my blog so my daughter can read this when she is older.
I laugh because a subtle argument in my Facebook feeds got me thinking about this. Well, my husband said it's not an argument, it's just boys trash taking. Fine. Price to the first person who can guess what it was about.
A couple of days back, someone posted that someone should stop pretending to be an expert when he is not even doing the same thing as the person he is giving his opinion on. Opinions from non-players are invalid because they cannot play. He is in the field so his and others in his status are the only opinions that matter. Comments were added to the effect that if they cannot do, then do not preach. Simply put, it was a call to shut up and stop giving your opinion if you are not an expert. And by his definition, experts are only those with first hand experience, hence my thought on my Facebook status.
So then I refreshed my newsfeed a few minutes after and there's a sort of answer to the first post. It says that a person can post whatever on his wall because it's his. No one can tell him to stop expressing his opinion just because he is not in the field. He may not be an expert because he doesn't play the game but it's something he loves and had been following all facets of it for decades. That gives him enough credit to know what he is talking about. So he is claiming his right to continue giving his piece of mind using his own level of expertise.
I was told not to mind and give a big deal about this. Well, I really don't care much about their arguments / trash talk. I just thought of a few random lessons I learned from these Facebook post.
Lesson #1: Respect other people's opinion
Not everyone is an expert. Everyone is entitled to their own thoughts and opinion. You may not agree and yours may be the opposite but their opinion is theirs. Respect that.
Lesson #2: Argue on facts, not on opinions
On a debate, be objective. Take the feelings out because that may cause you to spur words that can bite you back.If you are not able to win them over, then it's not their fault, it's yours. Check if your arguments are valid. And even if it is, just let it go. Do not hold grudges just because you are not on the same boat.
Lesson #3: Learn true empathy
Mila may be too young to fully understand this word. As early as now, we are training her to understand others. Empathy is not just putting yourself in the other person's shoes. The problem with that is we have our predefined conceptions based on previous experience that you may react differently than him when put on the same situation.
Instead, look at the whole picture and analyze where the other person is coming from. Understanding is asking the right questions. Get the root cause of his/her actions and opinion so you can properly empathize.
Lesson #4: You are what you say/post
You share stuff on social media knowing that a lot of people can see it. It is but normal if others make their own opinion about it and about you based on what you show them. You may be judged. You may be applauded or you may be ridiculed. If you know your self enough, make sure you can stand for your words.
#milaOOTD: Oct 2014
Headband: DIY Bows from her 1st birthday party
Crop Top: ordered from IG (@gamyella_shop)
Shorts: old navy
Shoes: Mini Melissa replica
Regardless of the back story, these lessons still hold true to me and Mila better learn them too.
