In my counseling practice, clients often give me special insights into their lives which can be helpful to others. Sometimes counseling becomes a therapeutic relationship offering mutual benefits. I like that! Clients’ experiences share information which can lead to universal truths to help others along their way.
Recently I was reviewing a homework assignment with a couple. Their task was to write a vision of what they hoped their relationship would be after their couples counseling sessions were completed. Each was to identify behaviors and actions they might incorporate if a miracle suddenly washed away all the negative, problematic situations they were unable to resolve. The most significant idea this couple threw out was “raising the bar.”
What a positive concept! They were taking what they already had and moving it up a notch.
What would happen if each day you woke up and asked yourself, “How can I move my relationship up a notch today?”
Your mind would then be focused on positive thoughts. This thinking would force you to hone in on what was already good and working well between you and your partner.
Your thoughts would be future oriented, instead of being driven by the past.
Relationship expert Larry James once noted, “Any construction of a thought that moves you in the wrong direction is counter-productive.” Thus it follows that moving in the right direction will be productive and will help you reach goals.
If you stay focused on what happened in the past that is exactly what you will get from life because the past then becomes the future. Couples working together to approach their problems with a proactive, positive movement forward tend to increase their happiness quotient.
How can you go wrong with a positive attitude? Imagine the possibilities open to you simply by creating a new and improved way of viewing your relationship.
Research floods the professional and self-help market extolling the benefits of positive thinking. Aspects of a healthy lifestyle include incorporating a can-do, move-ahead attitude. Recapping previous advice I’ve offered, positive thinking helps to:
- Increase your life span
- Lower rates of depression
- Lower levels of stress
- Improve your immune system
- Better psychological and physical well-being
- Reduce your risk of death from cardiovascular disease
- Encourage better coping skills during difficulties
- Increase your productivity
A client once told me she not only looked at life as a glass half full, but knew somebody would always come along to give her a refill. What a wonderful way to look at the world!
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