Family Magazine

Parenting Tips for Combating the Terrible Two’s and Temper Tantrums

By Upliftingfam @upliftingfam

Mom Talking To Child After Temper TantrumA few weeks ago my son moved to a new room at daycare and every since it seems as if he is throwing more fits and tantrums at home.  I know that there is a stigma attached to two year old children and parents must realize that all two year old’s go through a phase often referred to as the terrible twos.  I never really cared for that name “terrible twos” because I feel that a child that is two years old doesn’t have the necessary skills to properly communicate their wants, needs, and emotions.  I also, realize that most two year old’s are acting out because they are frustrated because they don’t know how to properly communicate.  So instead of trying to tell us what they want or at least attempt to tell us what the want, they are bound and determined to throw a fit to try to get their way or to make their point clear.  If you are like me, you think that your two year old is the cutest thing ever until they decide to throw a fit.  I love that my two year old is able to communicate most of his wants and needs; however, when he doesn’t get his way he will stomp around, hit himself, or throw himself in the floor.  As a parent, this is very frustrating and part of dealing with a two year old.  It is important that you respond to your child in a positive manner to avoid further issues down the road.

Disclosure:  The opinions reflected in this post are my own and are based upon my own parenting experiences.

Why Do Toddlers Throw a Fit Every Time They Hear the Word Know?

If you are the parent of a two year old, you probably already realize that they are constantly in motion, always getting into things that they aren’t supposed, seem to have their mind made up, and have their own ideas of doing things.  When they get into something that we don’t want them to get into or they are caught doing things they aren’t supposed to, which in a toddlers eyes is very often, so we are constantly telling them no.  Your toddler has figured it out that you are always telling them NO and they get frustrated because it seems as if they can’t do anything that they want to do.  Instead, of constantly telling them no you can give them choices.

You will also figure out that most toddlers at this age have no way of expressing the overwhelming emotions.  The emotions they feel are overwhelming to them and come from the fact that they are constantly being told “no”.  Your toddler will most likely have a meltdown when they are faced with an overwhelming amount of emotions and they have no idea how to control their emotions.  The tantrums will lessen over time as they learn how to communicate their emotions.

How Should You Handle a Tantrum?

When you toddler decides to throw a temper tantrum, it is best that you allow your child to have their meltdown as long as they aren’t hurting themselves.  I personally think it is better to teach your child that they aren’t supposed to throw a fit every time that they don’t get their way.  With my youngest, we send him to his time out chair when he throws a fit.  The best way to curb fits is to allow your child to get his or her way occasionally, as long as it doesn’t affect their safety or well-being.  You can give your child a small amount of control when it comes to making decisions that affect them and give them appropriate choices that they can make on their own.  Letting your toddler make his or her own decision often time means less fits because your toddler won’t get upset all of the time when things don’t do their way.

If you tell your child no, be firm and don’t give into their wants when they throw a fit.  This will cause more problems down the road.   Do offer your toddler praise when they are behaving and making good choices.  If you are in public, it might be best for you to pick up your child and leave the store if they continue to misbehave, especially, if you plan on disciplining your child every time they throw a fit.  When talking to your child about their behavior it is important to get down on their level and make eye contact with them.  Then make your toddler apologize for throwing a fit.  After they apologize, allow your toddler to give you a hug and kiss so that they know that you still love them.  This tactic is often seen on the show “Super Nanny.”

Discover the Root Cause Behind the Tantrums

As I said previously, your child is learning how to be independent and wants to make his or her own choices.  They are starting to realize that they are a individual human being with a voice and have the power to voice their own opinions.  During the early stages, most toddlers are trying to figure out what they can’t do and discover what they are allowed to get away with.  When your toddler doesn’t get his or her way, most likely they throw a tantrum.  Adults are the same way; however, most don’t throw unruly fits like a toddler does.  It is your toddler’s own way of figuring out what is right and what is wrong.  Instead, of following their parents orders from the beginning.

Can I Avoid Terrible Two’s Altogether?

Unfortunately, all parents will go through a stage of terrible twos with each one of their children.  Terrible twos is a phase that all children have to go through in order to learn the rules the hard way.  A toddler is a small person, that loves to test you to see what they can get away with.  Once your child, figures you out and discovers how you will react to their tantrums they should slowly get better.  Remember that this is a phase and the better you respond to your child’s tantrums the better off you will be in the long run.

What Can I Do If I Feel Angry at My Child For Constantly Throwing a Tantrum?

If you find yourself feeling angry, when you are trying to deal with your toddlers temper tantrums.  Sometimes you will need to take your own time out and step away from the situation, especially, if you are feeling upset or angry with your child’s behavior.  You don’t want to ever discipline your child when you are angry and you never want to resort to yelling at your child.  Taking a time out or counting to 10 will help you calm down so that you can make a rational decision on how to handle your child’s behavior.

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How did you deal with terrible two’s in your house?

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