I hesitated calling this post our ‘new’ normal, because I am hoping this is temporary and we will likely get back to our real normal eventually. So right now, this is our current normal. And it’s hard.
Ben and I both work full time. I normally work 100% remotely as a voice of the customer manager for a website and Ben works for the federal government. We are so lucky to still have our jobs and I feel even luckier that Ben is able to work remotely from home during this pandemic.
Willa normally goes to daycare five days a week, but has been home with us for the past three weeks. I am beyond grateful for our health and safety, but along with so many other parents out there, I am struggling. She turned 8 months last Sunday and learned to crawl that same day. She’s everywhere. Not only are we trying to navigate both working from home and being productive, but we’re also trying to navigate our first baby crawling and needing our constant attention.
COVID-19 Parenting Tips
Below are some parenting tips we’ve started using in our daily routine to stay sane. I just wanted to share them in case they may help anyone else in the same situation and also just to get some of my feelings out because I’m drowning in them lately.
Take Turns
This is the parenting tip I cannot stress enough. From the moment Willa wakes up in the morning, to the time she goes to sleep, Ben and I are taking turns. No questions asked, no hesitation, just constant back and forth.
I get up with her at 7 AM and nurse her and do her morning diaper and read her a book. Then I usually hand her off to Ben while I shower and get dressed. Then I come down and make something to eat and take over Willa duty while Ben does his emails. We usually discuss our daily meetings and plan accordingly, rescheduling if needed.
I put her down for her morning nap and that’s when my day usually truly starts. I respond to emails and messages and catch up on anything pressing from the night before while she sleeps. We get a bulk of our work done during that morning nap. We trade off the rest of the day based on our meeting schedules and then Ben puts her down for her afternoon nap. She’s dropped a nap and is down to two, but that means they are starting to get longer and we have more time to work, uninterrupted.
Try to respect each other’s schedule as much as you can. Sometimes I get so frustrated having to walk away from my task, but as soon as Ben is able, he whisks Willa away to let me finish. If you’re both working from home, I suggest trying this strict back-and-forth system. The first few days we were home, Willa would start crying and Ben and I would just look at each other like, “Okay, who’s going to handle this? We’re both busy right now.” But as time has gone on, I know if it’s my turn to swoop in and he knows if it’s his.
We do have flexibility when it comes to feeding her. If she’s hungry and my body is telling me to nurse her, I may take an extra turn with her. Or I may put her down for her afternoon nap if it coincides with feeding her. If I am too busy to nurse, Ben will take a turn with a bottle.
Night Rules
We have some hard rules for night time. No matter what time either of us decide to go to bed, if Willa wakes up before 2 AM, Ben takes care of it. If she wakes up after 2 AM, I handle it. No exceptions. This is another way to combat the “Well, who’s going to do it?” argument. This parenting tip has basically saved our marriage. Instead of fighting in the middle of the night or making passive aggressive comments first thing in the morning, we both just do our jobs and take care of Willa when she needs it. It’s fair and neither of us feels cheated of our sleep.
Get Outside
We take a walk every single day after work. Not only does it get us out of the house and keep Willa entertained, it gets us an hour or so closer to bedtime. Willa recently dropped her third nap, which she took in the late afternoon. By the end of our workday, she is sometimes an absolute bear. Getting her out of the house keeps her calm and by the time we get home, we have to keep her happy for about another hour before her bedtime routine at 6:30 PM.
We got outside today to enjoy the 65-degree weather and sunshine. It gave us something to look forward to all day and Willa let us take her picture!
How are you handling work and child care during this pandemic? Do you have any parenting tips or tricks to share with me? Please leave a comment, if so!
