Self Expression Magazine

Not Just Blowing Smoke

By Latoya @latoyallawrence

135274-1024x768-Indeed_bulletsI remember sometime back in the mid nineties a discussion that I had over the telephone with an associate of mine. I call this person who was a female an associate because I was never quick to describe everyone who I dealt with as a friend.

I’ve known and have come across a lot of people within my lifetime and I never wanted to be just anyone’s pal or to even consider and accept everyone to be as a real or true good friend.

A lot of my associates were genuinely fond of me yet I was never the type to get too socially or too closely involved into the lives of others. I was always the independent soul. The private loner who did not care to be bothered very often. And many people in particular had to respect that fact whether they liked it or not.

There was nothing really that they could do about it anyhow because I was going to do what I wanted to do and I was going to be how I wanted to be!

What my associates loved about me the most was that they could put their trust in me. I was genuine. A person of good conversation, smart, and fun to be around.

I feel that the word “friend” is and has so often been a term that is too loosely used now and again.

True friends in general are hard to find and everybody does not deserve the true title that comes along with being a good one.

Anyway, I had known this girl since I was fourteen. We were both in our early twenties when we were having our chat over the phone. We never saw each other quite too often. It was just an occasional engagement whenever we would get into contact with one another from time to time. We were totally different in character. She was a wild child, I wasn’t.

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Nevertheless, the vast difference in personality and within lifestyle never intervened into the relationship between I and certain others if we both had a strong connection to each other, or some other particular trait and characteristic that were similar and that we both liked about one another.

I never cared what other people did within their own personal life. It was purely about how they treated and reacted in regards to me as an individual.

One thing that I can honestly say about the people that have come in and out of my life is that no matter what they did or how they may have lived their lives they never ever once tried to influence me in any way when it came down to drugs, alcohol, and many of the other things that I never desired to do or to indulge in.

I mean, there are some who are always going to get those assholes who will come around by trying and endeavoring to manipulate one’s mind with their unscrupulous behaviors and their mischievous tactics in order to gain satisfaction through the degradation of attempting to drag another person down into their lowest of levels.

However, those types of degenerates are to just automatically be dismissed without further thought, but to only be recognized and remembered for the insight and experience of circumstances that are brought or gone through within our lifespan.

So as my associate and I went on with our talking and speaking about the specific and various topics regarding social issues, the world, and life altogether, we came upon the subject of how the male and female roles within our society are generally often bias.

The girl who’s name was Tiani stated “It all starts within the home”.

And though she did have a significant point as many do live what they grow up within and around I had another point of view to infer.

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“Everybody who lived in my home either smoked or drank. My aunt and uncle did hard drugs. I never did any of those things”, I told her, imparting how society itself can lend a hand and also play a big part of the influencing when it came to the personal or psychological development within some people, and what may entice their perspectives and behavior.

“Well, everybody isn’t as strong as you are”, Tiani had told me back in return.

I never at all thought back then that in not being affected by the things that were going on around me had anything to do with strength. I hadn’t analyzed the concept or even gave it much thought because my mind did not think like the average human being.

To me, things of that nature seemed beneath the tides of strength because in my opinion I could not have even imagined being tempted do to something that I deemed as either disgusting, having no basis, or as serving no purpose.

My mother had verified though that not easily being influenced and not doing certain things that are considered unnecessary and negative to one’s state of existence indeed had to do with being strong within the mind.

I understand that smoking is a habit “to” and that it comes as a habit “for” a lot of people. A very nasty habit that appears to be very hard for many to conquer and to overcome. I do not at all personally knock anyone who likes to smoke or who just cannot help from smoking due to the addictive and hazardous effects of the nicotine as well as the tar (the toxic chemicals) and the other unhealthy additives.

Yet cigarette smoking is something that I hate to be around and something that I do not understand. To me it is such a silly act (inhaling then exhaling repulsive garbage and fumes) that contributes to the spoiling and to the ruining of one’s body, health, and well-being.

My grandmother was an alcoholic and a smoker and died from a form of lung cancer because her lifestyle made her vulnerable to the evils and negative energies and backlashes that were able to snuff out her life.

Never would I go out of this world in such a way.

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A strong and healthy physical and spiritual constitution can miraculously maintain and sustain an individual through a serious ailment if they have taken good or excellent quality care of themselves for an long extension of time. They would be able to fight off and restrain any of the conditions that would normally affect or cause some major type of deterioration.

Aside from other relatives, I also know acquaintances who continue and who will continue to smoke regardless of the risks that it may cause to the quality of their lives. Even after the doctors had already told them that if they did not quit sometime soon there would be nothing that could be done for them medically (to prolong their life and to protect them from the certain drastic health problems) once a certain amount of time had passed over.

I can definitely understand carrying on with something that may bring a specific consequence or controversy out into the forefront through some particular fashion or by some celestial means as long as one truly and firmly believes in what is being held and is ultimately benefiting from what may be rewarded.

However, I do not comprehend the empty and worthless need to continue to smoke for the sake of self elimination.

Smoking as many of us know comes in a many of different types and forms. People have their own preferential choices and addictions. Some choose or have a weakness to smoke dope, crack, and/or to freebase (smoke cocaine).

Some also like to smoke “joints” (marijuana/weed) and blunts (hawaiian cess and so on).

Whether it is a addiction or just the indulgence in an casual “high” none of the behavior serves toward productivity, unless maybe when directed for the required medical purpose or use of particular herbs and other substances.

Nevertheless, whether banned within certain public areas, or currently still processed illegally, smoking is here to stay right now for the most part.

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I bet if a lot of people could calculate just exactly how much money that they have spent over the years and throughout the decades on the numerous purchases on their packs of cigarettes they’d begin to realize how they would have accumulated a significant amount of wealth that could have been considered a fortune! Even if it was just a small one.

When some people first began and started out to smoke (a lot of the time mostly the younger crowd) they did it because they thought that it was cool or that it would make them appear to look cool.

What is so cool about blowing smoke?

Some people would even go buy and smoke substances because it was the “in” thing to do. Going along with the fads and trends of the times.

What is so cool about blowing away money?

Then there are some who even claim that a good smoke contributes to relaxation and brings a calming affect or a relief to the nerves.

What is so cool about blowing one’s life away?

To me, smoking anything for any reason is nothing more than what it actually is, and that is a bunch of “silly and messy ashes that result from being the victim of someone blowing off their hot calamitous air”. And I am not and never will be one to get caught up into the midst of that hazy and stinging fog!

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