Oh this tumultous world breaks my heart.So much madness, hatred, violence, greed, and vitriol.
Sometimes I just don't understand it. It makes me question God's goodness. It makes me question my own heart. It makes me question grace.
After yesterday's events in Boston I had the very natural, very human reaction of sadness combined with bitterness. "Who would do such a thing?" I thought repeatedly throughout the day. "Who has so much hate in their heart that they would intentionally hurt so many innocent people?"
Oh right. Lots of people. Because free will applies to us all and many choose to use it to wound others.
"I hope they catch the people responsible and that they pay for what they've done." Oh yes, there it was. That vitriol. The very type of emotion that caused me such sadness was now pouring forth from my own heart and mind. And I didn't care.
My thoughts, my heart turned dark as I hoped for swift justice, for evil to get what's coming to him.
But then, a soft, gentle voice reminded me, "Lauren, Jesus has already paid that price. Whatever these people have done, they are forgiven."
"Nope God. Not buying it. Not listening. Don't care!"
I fought. I wrestled with my heart and with the distinct knowledge I have of God's truth. I didn't want to acknowledge it. I wanted to ignore the truth and give in to my sadness, my bitterness, my hatred. But He kept at it. His gentle voice would not cease.
"My son, He shed His blood for all My children, not just for the one's you deem worthy."
Ouch. "OK, I guess you have a point there."
"Jesus, covers it all and one day evil will be conquered for good. But until then, do not add to the evil. Do not give in to the hatred, the anger. Be my hands and feet. Be the good."
He was softening my heart and FAST.
And then this...
"There are no 'ifs ands or buts' when talking about when talking about grace."
There it was. His truth. And His ever persistant smack upside the head that brought my prideful bitterness to the ground.
There are no "buts" about grace people.
Yes, what evil sometimes accomplishes is horrible. What happened in Boston is gut-wrenchingly awful and grace in no way diminishes that fact.
But the scandalous truth is this... Grace covers it all. That's how powerful a force it is.
Grace covers those who constructed, planted, and detonated those bombs. Grace covers those who, like me, hoped for revenge and justice. Grace covers all the hate that's being spewed, all the evil that has ever been done.
BUT it also drives the good that is being done. It is God's grace, God's goodness, God's love that had those people running toward the madness to help instead of running away. It is the force that caused people who just finished the marathon, tired, distraught, and full of fear, to run to give blood. It is what motivated restaurant owners to open up their doors, to offer free food, free wireless for people to contact loved ones, and a warm place to sit if people just didn't want to be alone. It is what reminded all of us that we are one nation, under God. United. It brought the city of Boston to a grinding halt as a strong community formed, unwilling to let evil win.
Whether we see it now or whether hindsight will be 20/20, the good will always outweigh the bad. And if you believe in God's truth, you know that evil will ultimately be conquered by good. In fact, it already has.
I sit here this morning, with my coffee and my laptop, and I think about Boston and other cities where innocents have been killed. I think about those who have been directly affected by the evil and my heart goes out to them. I pray that they see the good in this world, that they see the love pouring out around them. I pray that they find peace and they find a way to forgive those who did this. I pray this for us all.
I think about grace a lot. I reflect on God's goodness and how He gifted us with this dynamic, sovereign, and shocking force. A force so strong that not even the most evil of deeds curtails it's power.
That my friends is grace. And it is amazing.
