There’s a first time for everything, and today was my first magusto, an autumn festival that revolves around roasting chestnuts and drinking wine. The group I volunteer with organized a magusto as a social gathering for the different departments (of which there are five) who otherwise wouldn’t see each other. Paulo and I are part of the smallest sub-group, and in total we were just three out of everyone there.
I was the only foreigner as usual, which also meant I was a fish out of water for a couple of hours. It is one of the downsides of living in a country that’s relatively homogeneous when compared to Canada, which is very diverse in its nationalities. Most social gatherings in a Canadian city will have foreigners; it’s rare to have a one-person minority. There’s always someone to share that feeling of ‘otherness’ with, either to commiserate or simply share the minority status silently. Last night when I was talking to my fellow expat Canadian and she told me of all the nationalities she meets at social events, I had pangs of jealousy. I miss this.
Here in Portugal, I’m not just the only Canadian everywhere I go, I’m the only foreigner in my husband’s family (and extended family), too. Most days I’m oblivious to it, but there are times when I’m acutely aware. It may not bother the more extroverted expats, but as an introvert I avoid social gatherings with more than a few people unless there’s an obligation. Given a choice, I prefer to be invisible at these events, and it’s impossible to be invisible as me in Portugal.
So what’s an introverted expat to do? I don’t know. It takes mental energy to be sociable, and it takes an extra measure (or two, or three) to be sociable in another language. I can’t do it yet. I hate small talk in English, how do I muster up the motivation to small talk in Portuguese? I don’t, which isn’t helping the situation. All I do is try to listen to people without zoning out, and try not to peer at the time. It’s a dilemma I am nowhere near solving.
Let’s drink to a solution…
photo by Paulo
photo by Paulo
photo by Paulo
November 13, 2015
Album: Portugal [Autumn 2015]
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