Much Ado About Dying- We All Eventually Will, But Gracefully?
A new documentary aims its lens at aging, gracefully or otherwise, and captures its subject perfectly in a lighting in a bottle type scenario. I actually related quite a bit to the themes of this documentary. My childhood was half spent taking care of my grandfather in a nursing home. When I was 10, I lost my grandmother, and I moved with my Mom to a small town with one nursing home, and my grandfather required full time care. He was already a full time wheelchair user, and a combination of dementia and Parkinson’s made it difficult for him to do much of anything. but, the nursing home sucked, and elder law and protections really needed to be expanded at the time. I learned so much about staffing requirements, the differences between a NA, CNA, LPN, and RN, all before my teenage years. My Mom spent so much time there, believing that the randomness of her ability to show up meant that they couldn’t predict, and just have him looking presentable on Sundays. They could’ve just remember to clean him on the day we had, or the times we typically came. She would show up late at night, just to check on him.
I also understand this film from another perspective. While it isn’t necessarily the most blind positive thing to say, I understand it from the perspective of someone who occasionally needs some level of caregiving, or help, from time to time. I know there are blind people who do everything by themselves, and that’s great. But sometimes, you drop something on the floor, it is small…. and you know it could have bounced or rolled. You can either stand proud and spend hours scouring every possible inch, or you can ask a sighted person if they happen to see it, saving you a ton of time. Sighted people are also great to have when accessibility fails us, or in any multitude of situations where we might just need context.So as someone who has to ask for help sometimes, when I used to not need to, I understand how hard that ask is. Even going back and forth with film studios and reps about accessibility on titles, while I’m doing my own advocacy, in some ways I’m relying on very likely sighted people to relate to and understand the need for something I need them to provide to me, and people like me, without actually needing it themselves.
So, while Much Ado About Dying did not have audio description, I can’t also say that I didn’t relate to the experience of an lGBTQ filmmaker called home to take care of his Uncle, who himself was once an aspiring actor, and watching as a filmmaker turns their lives, and their experience as care giver and receiver into a meditation on our final moments on this earth, and trying to have some control over it.
When this passed my way, i noticed a lot of the YouTubers doing the interviews, or the reviews, for this film weren’t your typical film critics, but rather channels focused on aging. Perhaps that’s the greatest compliment to a filmmaker, is that when your experience is so resonant, it becomes attractive to those who report outside your medium. When the aging community finds you to be a topic of interest, then perhaps you’ve done something right.
But, as this film does have many moments that are clearly grounded in the visual medium, and the lack of available audio description makes it tough to put a firm grade down, I’m left at the point where I would lightly suggest taking a look at this. I can’t recommend it to blind and low vision users, even if I think they, or their family, may find similarities in their own stories. Not everyone with vision loss is exclusive to just that one disability, and perhaps there are many who have vision loss, and additional ailments that require more obvious levels of caregiving that could be reached by this film.
If you get a chance to catch this, it isn’t going to land an Oscar nomination, but that doesn’t make it not worth your time. Often documentarians flourish when the world is on fire, and a quiet look at aging gracefully just will not make the same impact as something like No Other Land (focusing on the horrors of living in war torn Gaza) or Sugar Cane (diving into America’s dark history of taking Indigenous children and forcing them into schools that stripped them of every fiber of their being). Those films take a look at a perspective we are grateful to never have had to follow, while also making us acutely aware of the tremendous pain felt by those who do. Much Ado About Dying is exactly what it says it is. It is that thing we will all do someday, and we can’t put that distance between us and the subject matter. It may feel somehow easier to watch this film than the harrowing experiences of others, but the truth is, while the others often face futures we likely will never face, death comes for us all. Perhaps, that is the most sobering truth to be found.
Final Grade: Unwatchable
Predicted Grade With Audio Description: B+/A-
