Today’s great smile is from a new site I found Meanwhile back in Canada (Facebook). Unfortunately, due to a family emergency and my own health I have been taking some time off to deal with every thing. Although I do have many commitments this month I promise to try and post more often I miss you all so much and you are always in my thoughts and heart. So with that in mind the following smiles are from some of my favorite sites Colours of Life, Bob Lucas, Maxine, Jokes, funny, laughs and quotes, Laugh it’s free and Can U Still Hear Me?. I hope these put a smile on your lips and your heart.
The bartender replies, “Same as what I’m doing to his business.”
These final great ones are from my FB bud Baz. OMG so funny thanks for sharing Baz!
Little Boy at the Nude Beach
A mother and father take their 6-year old son to a nude beach…. As the boy walks along the sand, he notices that many of the women have boobs bigger than his mother’s, so he goes back to ask her why. She tells her son, ‘The bigger they are, the sillier the lady is.’ The boy, pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocean but returns to tell his mother that many of the men have larger things than his dad does. She replies, ‘The bigger they are, the dumber the man is’ Again satisfied with her answer, the boy goes back to the ocean to play. Shortly thereafter, the boy returns and promptly tells his mother, Daddy is talking to the silliest lady on the beach, and the longer he talks, the dumber he gets.’
God Loves Drunks too!
A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. “Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3:00 in the morning!” He slams the door and returns to bed. “Who was that?” asked his wife. “Just some drunk guy asking for a push,” he answers. “Did you help him?” she asks. “No, I did not, it’s 3 am in the morning and it’s pouring rain out there!” “Well, you have a short memory,” says his wife. “Can’t you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself! “God loves drunk people too you know.” The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain. He calls out into the dark, “Hello, are you still there?” “Yes,” comes back the answer. “Do you still need a push?” calls out the husband. “Yes, please!” comes the reply from the dark. “Where are you?” asks the husband……………….. “Over here on the swing,” replied the drunk.
Zoo Day
A man and his wife were spending the day at the zoo. She was wearing a loose fitting, pink dress, sleeveless with straps.. He was wearing his usual jeans and T-shirt. As they walked through the ape exhibit, They passed in front of a large, silver black gorilla. Noticing the wife, the gorilla went crazy. He jumped on the bars, and holding on with one hand and two feet he grunted and pounded his chest with his free hand. He was obviously excited at the pretty lady in the pink dress The husband, noticing the excitement, thought this was funny. He suggested that his wife tease the poor fellow some more by puckering her lips and wiggling her bottom. She played along and the gorilla got even more excited, making noises that would wake the dead. Then the husband suggested that she let one of her straps fall to show a little more skin. She did… and the gorilla was about to tear the bars down. “Now….. show your thighs and sort of fan your dress at him,” he said. This drove the gorilla absolutely crazy and he started doing flips. Then the husband grabbed his wife, ripped open the door to the cage, flung her in with the gorilla and slammed the cage door shut. “Now. Tell him you have a headache.”
Our prayers and thoughts go out to the families and victims of the shootings in Scarborough Ontario and Aurora Colorado!
Be kind to each and have a safe weekend!
