Are you a divorced, widowed or single senior who has begun dating again after many years or contemplating doing so? If so, you are probably like many 60+ adults who haven’t had much dating experience for say, 40 or so years. You might be wondering where you should even start to look for other compatible and available folks- and what you need to know in case you actually find one.
According to AARP, 45% of adults 65 and over are separated, divorced or widowed. That’s a pretty big number, so you do have a large field to choose or be chosen from. But where do you go to meet these people? The internet is one place. AARP has recently teamed with HowAboutWe, a dating website- and together they suggest offline dates to members who want to “meet people in the real world.” Apparently they have attracted almost 60,000 users- so the interest is certainly there.
But what if you don’t use a computer, have little or no experience with one, and/or are not comfortable with meeting someone that way? After all, rejection is hard at any age, but can be very tough on an older person who may have been in a relationship for years, has no recent experience with having to put themselves out there- and who doesn’t have as much time or opportunity as young daters who are practiced and savvy in the art of marketing themselves.
You could consider using a matchmaker. There are an estimated 3,000 matchmakers in the U.S. and about 90% of them work with seniors. One issue that women going to matchmakers should be aware of is that senior women outnumber men, and it may be that there are few available males in a matchmaker’s client base. If the men just aren’t signed up, a woman’s chances of meeting someone go way down. Fees can start at 10,000 and go way up from there- some paid upfront and the rest if a match is made.
The good news is that older folks are looking for stability and companionship most of all. Women don’t care much about how much money a man has- and men aren’t focusing as much on looks.
A matchmaker can look at your values, personality traits, lifestyle needs and wants- and use these to find someone who is a similar to you. You would get to meet people that you would not ordinarily come into contact with- and the process is easier, safer and less hurtful. When using an online dating site, many folks might view your profile and yet no one will contact you- ouch.
If you have the financial resources and are looking for someone to go through your later years with- this might be for you. Make sure you do your research, ask a lot of questions and get your matchmaker to really work for you. If you can’t afford this, consider going to HowAboutWe and trying to connect with others that way. It’s still safer, less pressure- and you get to experience them in real time, right from the start. Even if you don’t find love, you could meet some new friends and have someone to call when you want to go out and play.
