the internet certainly has an opinion on this film. It’s like a grand offense that occurred, the cinematic equivalent of slapping someone’s mother. But is it really? If you want to comb back through, you’ll see that I didn’t quite buy the doom and gloom of Morbius, if for no other reason than it was the most normal performance Jared Leto has ever given. But, Madame Webb also has moments where it clearly could have been at least a decent film. So, let’s break down the hate, and see if it’s warranted. but first, the audio description.
Laura post and Deluxe are responsible for the audio description here, and it’s the unsung hero of 2024. It’s the track no one will remember was good because it’s associated with such a maligned film. But the film has all the trappings of Webbb’s powers to see time differently described rather well. The action sequences also are done well. The audio description will not be the reason you don’t like this movie.
So, a compliment sandwich. I liked Adam Scott in this. Playing the partner to Dakota Johnson’s titular paramedic, I thought he actually gave a good performance, and stood out above the rest. Secondarily, Emma Robert’s was totally fine in a smaller role. And, for what it’s worth, Dakota Johnson is not the reason this thing falls apart.
A very prominent film critic stepped in to defend the director, saying the studio likely made this film garbage, but I push back on that. This director doesn’t really have anything to indicate her talent beyond some TV episodes. The script is just a hot mess. Even if this was edited to death, it’s an awful script.
We open on Webb’s mother trying to find this spider, and she’s betrayed by her friend (Tahar Rahim) and then we find out she’s pregnant, and her baby grows up to be Dakota Johnson. However, what you don’t get is the background of the weird jungle tribe, and their connection to this spider. It’s like something introduced and forgotten. The worst thing is Rahim’s dubbing, which sounds awful, even if I can’t see it. He actually sounds dubbed, and I think Rahim is a talented actor. I’m not even convinced that is his voice.
There are also these three girls that Johnson has to protect, who have so little personality, I think one of them is literally supposed to be recognized by her possessing a skateboard. A skateboard is not a personality. Sydney Sweeney is one of those girls, and between Anyone But you and Immaculate, it’s like she did this film against her will.
Some of it works, some of the action is fun, and the pacing isn’t terrible. But, the script is awful, and whoever did the ADR should be fired. I honestly enjoyed this more than Rebel moon Part 2 though, and a few other films I’ve seen this year. Those small parts that work, keep this from being an utter travesty. But, I still wouldn’t recommend this, and I’m sure Aaron Taylor Johnson is shitting himself over what the Final Cut of Kraven The Hunter must look like at this point. I’d be surprised if that went theatrical after this. Venom 3 has its audience, but after Morbius and Madame Webb, the only person who can save Kraven is the man who started it all, and I don’t think Sam Raimi wants to step in and save a Spidey spinoff.
Final Grade: C-
