Lessons In Being A Mom

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I know a lot of people out there write about being a mom and what it means.  And most of the time it seems like it’s meant to scare people off almost.  Well, I have been at it for 14 years and while it’s the hardest job I have ever had and probably ever will have it’s also the greatest.  And there are just some things about having kids that I have learned that I want to share with you.  These are things that no matter what your parenting style, whether you do attachment parenting, helicopter parent, free range parent, or something in between these are just things you need to know when it comes to having kids.

6 Lessons In Being A Mom

1. They require unconditional love, but don’t always give it back.  Don’t get me wrong, I know my children love me, but it’s not always obvious.  So don’t go into parenting looking to be loved in a certain way because you give a lot of yourself.  That’s not a bad thing though.  I would absolutely lay down my life for any one of my children even after my 14 year old screams she hates me and tells me I don’t love her.
2. They don’t get easier as they get older.  It just gets different.  Actually, there’s really not a golden age that if you can just make it to you’ll be good.  Well, unless I haven’t gotten there yet.  The older they get the more you forget about the trials and tribulations of the earlier years because now there are new things to deal with.  In a lot of ways though my teenager can be very similar to my toddler.  Sweet one minute and crying and emotional the next.  It’s just not so much over the fact that someone took her favorite toy and more over an unknown force in the universe.
3. No matter how many times you think your child has seen you do something, don’t assume she just knows how to do it. You must give precise instructions of how something should be done and then be prepared to get a million follow up questions.
4. It doesn’t matter how many children you have, 1 or a million, you will love them all equally.  Not the same mind you, but with the same amount of force.  Your heart just grows with each addition to the family.
5. You will be forever changed as a person.  This doesn’t mean your past just goes away.  I just mean your priorities will be different.  You will probably feel torn between your family and your career.  And things that once bothered you about kids or parents will probably go away too.  Blood is not so faint inducing when it’s your own child.  Leashes don’t seem like such a bad idea when you’re in a crowded place and your child insists on walking instead of riding in the stroller.  Parents don’t always get the blame for everything a teenager does because you understand that despite our best efforts sometimes kids have to find out for themselves that their parents were right.
6. Mistakes are going to be made.  Despite your best efforts you will forget something or say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing.  You will apologize and promise to do better the next time and your child will be okay.  You will probably be harder on yourself for those mistakes than your child will be.

So that’s what I have learned in nearly 14 1/2 years of parenting.  I’m no expert; no one is.  But I have experienced a lot.  I’m looking forward to what the next stages of life will bring, but also trying to savor the times we’re in now.  As much as no one likes to hear it, it really does go by so fast.

What lessons in being a mom did I leave out?