Life Coach Magazine

Is Honesty Always The Best Policy?

By Rjnielsen039 @RobertJ_Nielsen

Noel Coward

“It is discouraging how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.” ~Noel Coward~

“Confidence in others’ honesty is no light testimony of one’s own integrity.” ~Michel de Montaigne~Michel de Montaigne

John Quincy Adams“All men profess honesty as long as they can. To believe all men honest would be folly. To believe none so is something worse.” ~John Quincy Adams~

I felt like today’s quote just had to be about honesty. There was no particular reason, it just felt right. We all know that person (or people) that just can’t be honest, no matter how well their intentions. The pathological liar that convinces him or her self that they are telling the truth, or at least a variation of it. The snake with two faces that always happens to side with whomever they’re currently speaking with. Even the [blank] that lies to them self to convince them of whatever end they’re trying to achieve or justify.

Tooth Fairy

Shown: The Tooth Fairy

Nobody is so honest that they never lie, even little white lies. We all tell our friends that we like their crappy painting, our significant others that their new hairstyle looks great, or our kids that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy bring them gifts and money. Whatever it is you lie about, it’s still there. I’m not preaching that we’re all wrong or anything like that, because I do believe that in some cases lying is acceptable. Some may not agree. It’s a controversial subject, though one not often thought of or brought up. Lies can hurt, and everybody knows that, but one thing that most people don’t think about is that lies can help as well. Most people have heard of the extreme example of lying to a loved one on their death bed, telling them that they’ll be okay to give them peace during their last moments. Or how about lying to someone to save their feelings when the truth would just be too painful? I’m all for people giving me constructive criticism, specially for the things I’m most passionate about (such as my writing, hint hint), but it’s not always about doing something write or trying to be better at it than somebody else. Some times I just want to sing with my family and friends, and have a great time. I know I can’t sing. Oh, and did I mention I have a horrible voice for it as well? Because I do. I know I’m not good at it, but that doesn’t mean I want everyone informing me of this fact. I just want to have a good time doing it with the people I care about in an informal atmosphere.

So I guess the point I’m getting at here is that everything has to be viewed at from more than one perspective. I try and live my life with as much integrity as possible. I try to associate with people of a similar attitude. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t recognize that truth and deceit are still words, language. And what is language? A tool. It’s the end that justifies the means, right? Possibly. I can’t answer that for you, that’s something you’ll have to discover for yourself, but for me, I know that I would never lie in an attempt to gain something out of it. I would never lie just to benefit myself, bring somebody else down, or profit. But if you were laying on your death bed, showing me your crappy painting of the sad haircut you just got (possibly the reason you’re on your death bed), I wouldn’t hesitate to tell you how great you look, how things are going to be okay, in this life or the next, and how Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy are already getting ready for the next round of cash and gifts to be distributed to you.

Every tool has a purpose, including language, and lies are just part of language. Think about it.

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