Y'ever watch True Blood or read the Sookie Stackhouse novels?
You say you're a heterosexual male... so no?
Let me re-phrase.
Have a girlfriend/wife?
Y'ever passively listen while True Blood plays in the same room as the couch you're sitting on, while waiting for Anna Paquin to get naked again?
That's what I thought, you coy motherfucker.
In said world, "V" (vampire blood) is used as the ultimate psychedelic/ opiate/ steroid/ stimulant drug.
Impetuous Ritual and their full length, Relentless Execution of Ceremonial Excrescence, is like V--
but only if it came from Cthulu!
That's right-- Impetuous Ritual creates the suggestion of mainlining the very life fluid of the most ancient of the Old Ones.
More evidence of said controversial thesis:
One, it's like they're seriously trying (facetiously?) to out-complex-name Carcass and the 1000 death metal bands and their obsession with medical textbook terminology that followed in their wake (e.g., just dig that album title);
Two, if Portal weren't fucking weird enough for you;
Three, if you love Sunn O))) and their obsession with sound and its effects on the human body for their own sake (rather than as music);
Four, if you love that photo above (no shoes or shirt, big-ass 7-string string guitar, grizzly fuck-off beard, bloody face, wrist spikes);
Then THIS is the death/black metal/noise band for you.
Impetuous Ritual, Australian, formed from two members of Portal, released Relentless Execution of Ceremonial Excrescence (on Profound Lore) in late 2009; since then apparently it has been worming its way to me, presumably via the Pacific then Atlantic Oceans.
That's a creepy thought-- thought it somehow also makes me feel loved. Or at least attended to.
It's low-fi, noisy, blast-beat-ridden, shriek-filled, violent, menacing, incoherent fury that very nearly, if not altogether, transcends the normal functions of music as we know it.
Tracks:
"Convoluting Into Despondent Anachronism" blasts out of the gate and later drops into a sweet noise/doom riff at about 3:00; "Coalescence of Entropy" features some stupid-hard drums, both blast-beats and wildly high-metre 4/4 (I'm guessing around 350 bpm-- and the music-training programs I usually use to practice only go to 340); "Ceremonial Disembowelment," at about 0:50, lurches down into a great tremolo-picked doom riff before it takes off again periodically into blast beats; "Destitution" (instrumental, and my fave so far) is nearly all doom, with a a stupidly-detuned riff in what sounds like fourths (not the fifth of the power chord we all know and usually love); "Ritual of the Crypt" has a fucking cool vibrato'ed doom riff at about 0:50 (new favorite!), and the album closes out with the slow, dirgy "Dirge."
If you're in a mood that's open this type of sound (only scarcely a type of music-- though this isn't an insult)-- this is some cool shit.
Though in all honesty, if you consistently have this on, and love it-- you might seriously consider antipsychotics and/or antidepressants. No functioning human being should be in this mood all the time.
--Horn
