I am a judgemental mommy. I see things that other mummies do and I think "Oh my gosh...what on earth?" I see things in shops that make me shudder and say firmly "My child will never have that", while giving a judging look to the person behind me who is picking it up gleefully.
I judge, all the time.
But...I think that is human nature and I'm pretty sure I am getting judged all the time as well. We choose to do things a certain way because we believe that is the best, or right, way to do it. So of course we don't fully understand when someone else does it differently than us. Surely that is natural? To see someone make a different choice and not understand it, and to think that we would never do it that way, heaven forbid. In fact, it's so natural for us to judge, especially mummy-to-mummy, that a group of ladies put this campaign together to get us to stop.
Here's the thing though - I judge much less now that I am a mommy than I did before hand!
I have a lot of mommy friends from all walks of life, from all across the world, with lots of different parenting styles, opinions and views. And I respect every single one of those mummies as I know that every choice they make is what they think is best for their child. I may not agree with their choice, it may make me shudder, but I know that they do it with only their child's best intention at heart and so I admire them.
Before I had Isabelle I couldn't understand why people wouldn't do things a certain way - they way I think is "right". Why would there be any other way to do it? Now, I see mummies doing things differently from me all the time and I see how stupid I was to ever think that. There are things I would never choose to do with my child - things I would never buy for her, feed her, let her have.
I see other mums doing those things and I just cannot understand why they think it's a good idea - which to me is judging them. But the difference now is that I don't really care. Which sounds really mean, but all I mean is that it is your business what you do with your child and definitely not mine.
And that works both ways. I know that most people don't understand why I breastfeed a 19 month old, wear her on my back to walk and use cloth nappies. They don't understand why she doesn't watch any TV or why she isn't allowed sweets and chocolate (she is now allowed ice cream every so often). They don't understand why I despise plastic toys, or think a toddler having more than 1 pair of shoes is ridiculous. Most people think I am slightly nuts, and maybe they are right! I'm sure they judge me for my crazy, hippy ways all the time. But I'm not that bothered at all, because it's nobody else's business what I get up to with my child.
So yes. I am judging you, and I'm positive you're judging me too.
But one thing that being a mommy has taught me is that we are all just trying to do the absolute best for our children, and we all make the best decisions we can at every turn. So even though I'm judging you, mainly I admire you because we are all just trying to muddle through this motherhood business the best way we know how.
