I'll Be Home for Christmas

It was so great to get out of the hospital and to get home just before Christmas!  It felt so good to be in my own house with everyone that I love.  There really is no place like home.  

Me and My Bailey - Fall 2010

One of my best friends was there to greet me as she always is.  My Bailey girl.  The greatest dog ever.  I really don’t know how I would have gotten through each day without her.  I remember reading somewhere that animals, especially dogs, can sense when there is something wrong with us humans.  Bailey certainly seemed to sense it and was always by my side.  When I was really feeling down she would stay very close and just put her head on my lap and look at me.  Other times she would follow me around the house and I would talk to her about all kinds of things.  Why not?  One time when I was lying on the couch, feeling like crap, crying my head off, feeling sorry for myself and wanting my Mommy to look after me; Bailey slowly walked over to me and quietly put her head on my shoulder.  How awesome is that?  Man’s best friend?  More like a girl’s best friend.  Who needs diamonds?
So getting home made me very happy and I was able to do what I could to prepare for Christmas.  I got Christmas cards done and mailed.  The house was also decorated a bit.  I wasn’t worrying about food preparations or anything like that because my Dad and Sheila were coming and I knew that they would help out with that.  I remember feeling tired and weak almost all the time.  I was also afraid of getting sick and avoided people as much as I could.  Being out in public was not something I wanted to do.  Although Mike and I are both usually sociable people that enjoy parties and being with friends, we were starting to feel like hermits.  We just kind of wanted to shut the world off because we were in our own world now that was consumed with cancer and treatments and doctor appointments and there was nobody that could understand our world right now.  Well nobody we knew anyway.  They weren’t in it like we were.

Tasza & her cousin Trent
opening gifts - Christmas 2004

We had tried to organize to have a Christmas party earlier in December and had even sent out invitations thinking that maybe it might do us good to be around lots of people to pull us out of this funk we were in.  Then when I ended up in the hospital we had to cancel the party.  That was another crappy thing that Mike got stuck doing.  He had to tell everyone what happened and then had deal with the questions and so on.
Mike also told me that there was a steady stream of friends at the door bringing food for him and the kids while I was in the hospital.  He had a hard time with that.  He felt like he should be reciprocating somehow.   My Dad told him that wasn’t necessary.  He gave some good advice:  just say thank you.  That’s it.  Folks know that it’s appreciated and they want to somehow feel that they are contributing to help in some way.  They are not expecting anything in return.  So just a simple thank you.  My Dad is a pretty wise man don’t you think?
It was nearing the end of December and we were home and getting settled in for a long winter’s nap. I'll Be Home for Christmas - Rascal Flatts