One of my lovely readers sent me her style conundrum (which I know she is not alone in feeling):
"Can you help me find the courage to wear stylish clothes when it hasn't been my look now I think one of the things that can often feel daunting is to completely change your style all at once."
I can tell you that I know that many women feel the same way and figuring out how to merge the old version of you with a new and improved version without feeling too conspicuous can be tricky.
Finding Courage in Fashion: A Personal Style Evolution
Have you ever found yourself wondering, "Can I really pull off a stylish look?" This question, simple as it may seem, often carries a weight of self-doubt and apprehension. It's a common challenge: the leap from a familiar style to something new and stylish can feel like a daunting endeavor. But here's an empowering thought: Style is not about an overnight transformation; it's about taking small, confident steps toward self-expression.
Who do you want to be? You may be stuck in a style rut and wanting to step out of it, yet don't want to get too much attention as you do this and slowly gain confidence. Thinking about what your ideal style recipe is for right now and going forward can be a really useful activity to help you move forward with this.
The Psychology of Style: Embracing Compliments and Attention
It's intriguing to observe how compliments, meant to uplift, can sometimes make us feel uncomfortable. This discomfort can deter us from stepping out in style. Why is this? Often, we prefer to blend in rather than stand out, fearing undue attention or appearing over-dressed. This mindset can be a barrier to exploring new styles. Remember, style is an expression of your unique personality, not a plea for attention.
It's interesting how many people fear compliments. I wrote a post about this phenomenon here.
Small Changes, Big Impact: The Incremental Approach to Styling
If the idea of a complete style overhaul feels overwhelming, consider the beauty of small changes. It's not about diving in 'whole hog,' but about introducing subtle tweaks to elevate your look. For instance, swapping running sneakers for dressier ones, or adding a scarf or an accessory, can significantly uplift your outfit. These little alterations can make you feel more stylish without stepping too far out of your comfort zone.
For example, a tee and stretchy skirt, what makes the outfit more interesting and stylish is the pattern on the tee, and then the bracelet and coloured sandals.
Here are more tips on how to develop your style when you lack confidence.
The Levels of Refinement: Understanding Your Style Spectrum
Style isn't one-dimensional. It's a spectrum ranging from formal wear to smart casual to outdoor leisure. If you're used to dressing in outdoor leisure attire, jumping straight to formal wear isn't the answer and it probably would make you look a little ridiculous getting about the supermarket in your ball gown. Instead, gradually introducing smart casual elements can be a more comfortable transition. Think about a cool bomber jacket instead of a blazer or your more casual polar fleece or a well-fitted pair of jeans instead of baggy ones. This approach allows you to level up your style without feeling overwhelmed.
Style Is Personal: What Does Being Stylish Mean to You?
Ask yourself, "What does stylish mean to me?" It's a deeply personal question. Being stylish isn't about following the latest trends; it's about finding what works for you and aligning it with your lifestyle. It's about the little choices - maybe swapping sneakers for ballet flats or ankle boots, or choosing a blouse over a t-shirt. These choices help you gradually refine your style, making you feel more confident and less conscious about attracting attention.
Interest will die down quickly, even if you do make a more drastic change to your style, yes, you may get a few comments to start with, but when you're consistent with your new style, that becomes your new norm and people stop noticing it and most likely commenting so much.
Conclusion: Embrace Your Style Journey
Remember, the journey to embracing a new style is not about drastic changes. It's about making small, incremental adjustments that align with your comfort level and personal taste. Start with one thing at a time, feel good about it, and then add another. It's a journey of self-discovery and expression, where each step you take is a reflection of your evolving style narrative.
As you embark on this journey, remember: You are not just changing your clothes; you are revealing your inner self, one garment at a time.This is why I highly recommend you take my Evolve Your Style challenge - it's that little daily nudge for just one month that will help you get out of that style rut and up your style game in small incremental ways that have a life-changing effect!
Have you experienced a similar journey in your style evolution? How have small changes impacted your sense of style and confidence? Share your thoughts and experiences; let's inspire each other in this beautiful journey of self-expression through style.
Further Reading
Compliments - Why You Should Give Them and Take Them
Hiding Behind Blandness
How Do You Like to Be Complimented?
