Love & Sex Magazine

How to Have a Successful Marriage: This 1 Word Answer is Key.

By Barbarajpeters @CouplesAuthor

how to have a successful marriageHow To Have A Successful Marriage


From the Huff Post: LAS VEGAS – “Theresa Faiss’ marriage to former state Sen. Wilbur Faiss lasted more than some lifetimes, and earned congratulations from the president. Just months after being recognized as being the longest married couple in America, the matriarch of the Faiss family has died in Las Vegas at the age of 97.

The couple was honored in January by the Worldwide Marriage Encounter as being the longest-married couple for 2012. They were married for 79 years.

In an earlier interview, Wilbur Faiss told the Review-Journal that the key to success in politics or in marriage is ‘compromise.’ 

Every day I ask her how she feels and,  Is there anything I can do for you?’ And say, `Honey, I still love you.’ “

As a marriage counselor, seeing couples on a daily basis and helping them stay in their marriage and learn how to have a successful marriage is how I spend my time, professionally speaking. The couples that come through my door all complain about the same thing, though they have different life scenarios. Some might be that they can’t communicate or they don’t share intimacy anymore or they have forgotten how to be friends, just to name a few. Other priorities have taken over their lives and many have forgotten that it’s the little things that mean a lot. Many feel it is just too much work to do for a healthy  relationship and feel resentful of doing more than their spouse. Many just get caught up in other things so they do not have to look at each other with purpose. Many just feel a relationship is supposed to be easy, and when it’s not, they state, “I’m just not in love with _____ anymore.”

Ultimately it comes down to the reality that they want the relationship to be just like the image they have in their minds of how it’s supposed to look – and the other partner is the one who needs to change to achieve this ideal.

There are numerous reasons why couples find their relationships, like a sinking ship going down, but still can’t seem to stop the leak.  There’s a single word solution that though challenging, is a simple way how to have a successful marriage. 

Reading this article brings it all back to simplicity. It is all about “compromise,” and clear communication along the way.  And isn’t that what we do in other areas of our lives every day?  We seem to be very good at compromise at work, for instance. Sadly, somehow we often even manage to treat our co-workers with more interest and respect than we do our spouses. 

I’d like to encourage you to try an experiment – see if I’m right. At the beginning of your day, take the time to ask your spouse or significant other how she or he feels and ask if there is anything you can do for her or him during your day.  And of course – saying I love you will set that day apart from all others!  Repeat daily and see how this tiny new habit might breathe new life and help you learn how to have a successful marriage – truly!

My wish for you is that this story will change today for you and your spouse or significant other and then that tomorrow can be a repeat of today.

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