Expat Magazine

How to Find a Good Farang Man in Thailand

By Harvie

Trolling through Twitter (add me btw here) I came across this blog post about How to Find a Good Farang Man in Thailand. I mean there are one or two valid points but for the most part, I don’t think it’s very relevant for Thai girls to use. Hopefully I can do a better job of showing them ‘the way’.

Lesson #1:Why guys come to Thailand

Before you start your search for the ‘good farang man in Thailand’, you first need to understand why the farang is here. Thailand offers farang men an amazing lifestyle that they cannot get back home. The food, weather, beaches, nightlife, cheap cost of living and GIRLS are the reason why guys come to Thailand. Notice girls is written in caps, and is plural.

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Lesson #2: Men are Men

The farang who moves to Thailand is usually someone who has broken away from the social norms of the west, hence moving to Thailand. I have a wide circle of friends, ranging from school teachers, writers, business owners, poker players, marketers and all other occupations you could think of. The age gap also varies from around 26-42, and NONE of them have ever stayed faithful to their girlfriend or wife. They treat their partner with the up-most respect, love them in most cases and play all the roles a loving husband or boyfriend would. But men are men.

Let me put it this way, you put a baby in front of a tiger and the tiger will rip the babies head off and eat it, animal instinct. Just like it is in a man’s DNA to sleep with women and reproduce, it’s how our body is wired.

Only over the last 50-60 years has it become a ‘dreadful’ thing where if you cheat on your girlfriend or wife, it’s unacceptable, in western society anyway. Go back 70 years ago or so, and every man had a mistress or visited the local brothel, the wife knew about it and she said nothing. Fast forward to today, and for some reason it’s a big problem.

Divorce rates are well over 50% in the west and why do you think that is? One reason is because we have stupid this idea in our head that we should be with one sexual partner for the rest of our lives.

Let me be straight with you girls, chances are your good farang boyfriend/husband is cheating on you be it with working girls or one night stands from nightclubs. The frequency of how often they cheat on you depends a lot on their age and how good or bad your relationship is.

For sure the younger guys 35< do it a lot more than the older farang who are married. As men get older, their priorities change and sex is not important to them anymore. Instead, they concentrate more on their family and loved ones.

I know married men who only go to hookers so they wives don’t find out. They don’t want to find new girls to have a long term connection with (they have their wife who they love for that). However, their DNA is telling them to have sex with someone else, and paying for it is the best and safest way without hurting their wife’s feelings.  They are not interested in building any relationship with girls, they just want sex, nothing else.

Guys do not sleep with other girls to hurt you, they do it because they are men.

What makes a Good farang

So now I hope you understand something about Farang men living in Thailand, please note that what I wrote above is not true for all guys. It’s a generalisation from what I’ve seen first hand from other farangs.

A good farang guy will be someone who is not tricking you to get you back to their room the first night, or after dinner saying they need to go home to “charge their mobile” or some other excuse to get back to their apartment. They will also introduce you to their friends and want to spend time with you as they get to know you.

Man and Two Women in Bed Together

A good farang guy may start by wanting to split the bill on the first and second date with you 50/50, this is for the guy to gauge whether you actually like him or you’re just after money or free food, clothes or whatever. Don’t be offended by this, but take it as a good sign, because he is testing to see what type of girl you are. If he likes you, after a few dates they will start paying for the majority of things.

If he does cheat on you, he will never do it in his apartment where you go to visit or live. The smart farang knows that his Thai girlfriend will ask the security at the desk if he brings back any girls, if they care for your feelings they won’t. This may sound totally retarded as if he cared about you he would not cheat, but as I mentioned, men are men, #DealWithIt.

You can find a good farang anywhere, online dating sites, clubs, bars, shopping malls but it takes time to build a relationship. Your average farang is going to be messaging several girls when he is single, you being one of them. And they know you will also be messaging other guys too, whatever it’s how it works here. As you get to know each other better and the relationship develops you will be the only girl he cares about.

Is your boyfriend active in helping you find a job? Giving you ways to save your money and offering tips on how you can improve your own lifestyle and future? Or does he only care about meeting you for sex? Does he try and improve your English when you make a mistake or offering out bits of help and advice to help you? These are all questions you need to ask yourself to know if he is a good guy or not.

Thai girls don’t have money so they cannot go out often or fund hobbies because their salaries are small, and they need to send money back home. So while a Thai girl focuses all her energy between working and her boyfriend, The farang doesn’t. He has hobbies, friends, sports, gym, clubs, bars, work and everything else to think about, and money to do everything listed.

Thai girls need to understand that even though you treat your farang boyfriend like a prince and put him number 1 after your family, he will not do the same too you. After a year or so he will put you in much higher regard, as he will know you better, understand you and maybe even fall in love with you. You need to give him time and not expect for him to give you his 100% attention in the first few months.

Some Farang men are douche bags

Some farang men living in Thailand are total anuses and treat girls really bad, you got to keep away from guys like this. They are usually easy to spot as they will speed up the meeting up process to a club, bar or mention for you to meet them at their condo in a subtle manner. They will lie to you a lot and if you’re a good judge of character it should be easy to spot

Anyway, I hope this gives Thai girls an understanding of the generic Farang living in Thailand. Guys, if you think anything I said is wrong or totally incorrect, feel free to leave a comment, I am open to criticism and all that.


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