Pressure. A lot of us feel it these days. We want to do everything, all at once, and get it done perfectly while we’re at it. We always want more, better, nicer. We want to do it all that’s why we’re all super busy. The bar is set really high when it comes to being successful. We compare ourselves to others. We want to work hard, work out, be social, eat healthy, party and have a relationship and be happy all at once. We’re very competitive and constantly looking for more, because anything is possible. Everything seems like it can be made, so perfection can be created as well. We compare ourselves to others who always seem to do better. We are achievers. And if we don’t achieve, we feel bad about ourselves, or guilty.
That’s one of the downsides to wanting it all. Feeling like you’ve failed if you don’t have lots of success in every aspect of life. It can cause a lot of stress and pressure, and I feel like our generation asks way too much of themselves.
Being a perfectionist has it’s downsides as well. Being one, you’ll find it hard to take advice from others and will want to do everything yourself. You’ll think in terms of ‘I have to’ instead of ‘I can’. Tasks can go slow, because they have to be performed perfectly. You may find it hard to make decisions and be afraid to make mistakes.
I personally think we should aim for mediocracy sometimes. Be less hard on ourselves. Don’t put the pressure on ourselves of wanting it all and wanting it now. The art of being good enough, because nowadays hardly anything is good enough. I used to put a lot of pressure on myself wanting to succeed in all areas of life, wanting to do everything perfectly and I’d feel guilty if I wasn’t constantly nailing everything. I have learned to let that go, and think of myself as good enough. It gave me a lot of peace of mind, and took away a lot of stress. Here’s some tips I used on how to be less hard on yourself..
- Allow the thought that some things are just normal, and not perfect. That way you can enjoy the things you actually stand out in. You don’t have to be amazing at sports, work 60 hours a week and have a bubbly social life all at once. Not everything has to be a highlight. Accept reality as it is.
- Don’t try to perform for the sake of performing, but perform because you like doing that certain thing.
- You may often sketch the ideal (perfect) situation as you hope it will happen. Next time, think of a good enough situation, with room for error. Don’t ask too much of yourself.
- Learn to be useless sometimes. To do absolutely nothing.
- Accept that making mistakes is part of life, part of learning and everyone makes them.
- Don’t live in the future all the time. Focus on the now. Find pleasure in the activity itself instead of just focusing on a goal. But if you’ve reached a goal, take a moment to reward yourself for that and celebrate it.
- Make small goals. Manageable ones. Take them one step at a time.
- Set boundaries and ask yourself how you’re feeling. Say ‘no’ more often, especially when feeling tired or stressed. Put yourself and how you feel first.
