In a new series, brides talk about how they ultimately chose their wedding dress. Perhaps the most exciting, yet overwhelming sartorial decision you will make in your life. There's plenty to learn from those who've been through the process - from the pitfalls to avoid to how to know when you've found 'the one'. This time, author and editor of Harper's Bazaar, Ella Alexander, talks about how she chose her dress for her Sicilian wedding.
I can pinpoint the exact day I thought I had found my dream wedding dress. On May 4, 2013, Keira Knightley married James Righton in a Chanel couture light gray bustier dress that fell to the knee. She skipped out of the French town hall where she married her husband hand in hand, wearing sunglasses and ballet pumps. I loved everything about that look - how comfortable she seemed and how beautiful, relaxed and unconventional her dress was. One would imagine it would be worn again, which she did in subsequent years. It wasn't dramatic, nor did it seem at odds with what she would wear in her regular life - and, crucially, it looked like a dress for dancing. The dress I ended up wearing on my wedding day couldn't have looked better. different from Knightley's, but the spirit was the same: non-traditional, quietly beautiful and with maximum dance floor mileage.
As any bride will tell you, the pressure to find the perfect wedding dress is immense. I had to find not one, but two outfits. My partner and I got married in Sicily in a city we both love, but legally we had to tie the knot in Britain first. We settled into Lambeth Town Hall in the heart of Brixton, a bus ride from where we live with our young son, where we hosted an intimate ceremony for 17 close family members, followed by lunch at a much-loved Italian restaurant called Maremma. Sicily would be a bigger party - a ceremony led by one of our best friends, followed by a giant knee-jerk in a baroque palazzo.
The dress I wore to my ceremony in London was easy to find; a full skirt midi length Monique Lhuillier style from The Outnet. I ordered a style in white and red, but chose red. It was the color I really fell for. I've had the idea of wearing a red wedding dress ever since I watched Gone With The Wind as a little girl and saw Scarlett O'Hara in a dazzling red number. I found a pair of Ganni taffeta mules to give it a contemporary touch, and we were done.
The second dress was a more winding journey. I never thought bridal boutiques would be my thing until a PR friend suggested I visit Halfpenny London, an intimate bridal shop in Bloomsbury and a favorite of celebrities and fashion editors. My appointment there changed the way I thought about wedding dress shopping - I tried styles I never would have considered following the kind, thoughtful suggestions of founder Kate and her expert staff. There was one dress I really loved: a white halter neck with a loose cape. I had gone from thinking I would be a whimsical, demure bride in a relaxed, knee-length dress to a bride who saw herself as a wedding version of Superman.
As the weeks went by, I still hadn't purchased the dress. It wasn't that I didn't like it, I did, but something was holding me back. My mother, noticing this delay, wondered why I had not asked "the great fashion designer in my life" in this search for the perfect dress. At the time, I co-wrote Zandra Rhodes' memoir, Iconic: My Life In Fashion In 50 Objects. Zandra had been a friend for a long time, but I was nervous about approaching her. I didn't want to seem greedy or overbearing. I also knew that Zandra no longer produced in-house and only designed through collaborations with other brands. She's also one of the busiest people I've ever met, and since I'm constantly telling her to sit down, I didn't want to add to her workload. Perhaps most importantly, I didn't have the budget her pieces required.
In the end I couldn't get the idea out of my head. I loved the idea of wearing a friend's dress, it felt personal and fitting with our story. If wedding dresses are ultimately a mix of style, individuality and emotion, then this would be a perfect fit. Zandra's aesthetic has always resonated with me - her 1970s dresses are a mix of beauty, romance and whimsy. Her dresses are made to twist. They transform everyone into chiffon bohemian fairies, from Bianca Jagger to Princess Diana. They are also extremely comfortable and would allow for multiple rounds of pasta in Sicily. I spoke to Zandra who asked if I was open to borrowing something from her archive. I seized my chance: who wouldn't want to get married in a piece of fashion history?
A few weeks later, my mother, my son and I met at Zandra's penthouse, where she had put together a row of white dresses dating from the 1980s to the early 1970s. Once again, I tried everything - demure off-the-shoulder numbers and full-skirted '80s looks, before I found 'the one': a long chiffon dress with wide sleeves and a plunging neckline from 1973. in my favorite of her prints,' Field of the Lilies', which she conceived during her first trip to Japan in 1971. It was delicate, ethereal and dreamlike. "I think Donna Summer wore the same style on the cover of one of her album covers in the 1970s," Zandra said casually, as my jaw hit the floor. I loved it.
Zandra generously suggested embroidering pearls and crystals around the neckline and at the ends of the sleeves. She covered part of the fabric with flower-shaped sequins "to capture that Sicilian light darling." She darted around me like a pink-haired elf, taking my measurements, spelling and stopping where necessary. She cinched my waist with a satin ivory sash, which I wasn't sure about until I saw it. I asked if we could lower the neckline so I could look more like Bianca Jagger in the plunging Zandra Rhodes dress she'd worn on a night out with Mick in the 1970s (as if the neckline was the only thing keeping me from it look the same). Zandra raised an eyebrow, but agreed. I couldn't believe it - I still can't believe it. My son kept it real by crushing cookies into her rainbow-colored floor. It was so different from what I had imagined wearing - there was so much more fabric, I was much more covered - but it was exactly right. I felt like me, but superlative. I didn't want to take it off.
Three fittings later we were talking about accessories. Zandra's savvy assistant Jordan suggested I consider Elsa Peretti jewelry. Elsa and Zandra emerged during similar periods and were part of the same fashion scene in 1970s New York; it felt like a great match. Tiffany, who exclusively sells Elsa Perretti's sculptural, distinctive pieces, agreed to lend me a necklace: an open-topped gold bottle pendant, an excellent complement to my lily-covered dress. For a bag, I opted for an ivory stone drop design from Stone & Mason, which was large enough for my phone and came with a jade roller, ideal for de-puffing the morning after. When it came to shoes, I wanted something sturdy to offset the lightness and femininity of the dress - Terry de Havilland's gold rock 'n' roll infused platforms were just what you needed. Zandra and I talked about veils, but - after they both agreed I was far from a blushing bride - she put me in touch with acclaimed milliner Piers Atkinson. Piers, who is known for creating avant-garde headpieces for Lady Gaga and Rihanna, very generously and skillfully created a subtle, intricate headpiece made with millinery veils, crystals, sequins and printed organza to match my dress. Without sounding cliché: I felt like Cinderella.
When the day of the wedding arrived in Sicily, Zandra insisted on coming to dress me. She rightly judged that I wouldn't be able to use an iron by her standards, and she did so herself. My family, Zandra, her friend Marjorie and I shared arancini at a large Italian table before walking to the eternally beautiful Palazzo Biscari, where the ceremony and reception were held.
Strolling through the streets of my favorite city with my family to a courtyard I know so well, and marrying the man I love, was truly the happiest I have ever been. I'm sure I'll have happier moments ahead, but it's good to recognize joy when it gives itself so completely to you. As for the dress, it came to life that day: all clothes need people to give life, but ZR clothes are designed to move. It's very hard not to dance in Zandra's dresses - they are made to twist, those sleeves are designed for big moves and big moments. They are made for fun, as evidenced by the Prosecco that may or may not have been spilled on them in the early morning hours as my guests and I twirled and tossed around on the dance floor. We gave those frescoed ceilings quite a show that night (I'm not sure if UK Garage or Take That have ever played in those historic rooms before).
I know not everyone has a fashion designer friend they can lean on when it comes to their wedding dress, and I am a privileged and grateful newlywed. But what every bride has access to on their wedding day is a look that will make them want to twirl. Aim for it, and you won't go wrong.
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