I think I have been going through menopause for at least 30 years now. It sure feels that way. I thought the symptoms were getting better but then the hot flashes came back. With a vengeance. I’m sweating in places no one should sweat. And it’s no mist either. It’s a full on rain forest over here.
My sleep is off again too. Used to be if I had trouble sleeping, I could pop a few Tylenol PMs and I would hit REM sleep faster than a rabbit being chased by a rabid fox. Not so much anymore. Now I’m up and down at night. It’s sleep deprivation all over again. I suddenly can relate to the new moms who are also sleep deprived. Look what you have to look forward to ladies!
And waking up is oh so hard. I used to never hit the snooze button. Now I can hit it at least three times before I realize I was even oversleeping. Some mornings I feel like I can’t wake up at all. I mean not even Sleeping Beauty’s Prince Charming could kiss me awake. Maybe more like the hot barista from Starbucks with a Grande Café Mocha in a Venti cup with extra whip might could do the trick!
I’m sure a lot of the trouble is sleeping with my own Prince Charming who happens to have sleep apnea. He uses a CPAP machine at night to keep him alive. If the tube slips a little, I am no longer sleeping with Prince Charming, but now I’m awake planning the death of Darth Vader. What woman hasn’t thought about killing her man in his sleep while he snores like a twister from tornado alley? WE NEED OUR SLEEP!
Yes I’m in touch with my doctor about all my problems. No I don’t use homeopathic meds or rituals. I do Yoga and drink. I’ve heard that alcohol can make the symptoms worse but for the love I am not giving up my cocktails.
But the last symptom that has come back with a vengeance is muscle cramps. My calves start to cramp up and my toes start to curl up on their own and I can’t uncurl them! What the heck! I’m up at 2 am trying to stiffly walk off the cramps, running into furniture while Darth Vader is slumbering in our bed like he has no freaking worries whatsoever! We woman have it rough. Puberty, Pregnancy, Menopause then death.
Anyone else? I mean go ahead and vent with me Y’all! We can start a tribe. What should we name our tribe of menopausal hangry women? lol
Keep on laughing ladies. It’s all we can do!
Peace, Love and Margaritas!
