Holiday shopping can be stressful. The Nerd is the hardest person to buy for, and I’ve been married to him for 9.5 years. He’s just not a gift person. And when I finally got him to tell me something he’d really, really like to have, do you know what it was? Drum roll please….
An organ.
Not like a kidney or gall bladder. And not the big kind in churches that are built into the walls. The kinds that are sort of like pianos but don’t sound nearly as nice.
Know what our living room is missing? NOT THIS. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
It took a long time to teach the Nerd how to shop for me. I’m not huge into gifts either, usually because people are like, “I know you wanted a gift card to TJMaxx, but I just thought these cat pajamas were so cute.” His gifts transformed beautifully though, from a piñata and Glad-Ware in the early days, to a Pandora bracelet and my first real pair of earrings over the past few years.
If you’re shopping for that special lady in your life, I’ve put together a handy buying guide for all occasions: no kids, one kid, lots of kids. Once kids enter the picture, our bar for gift gifting drops drastically. So bonus there.
YES. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Bling
No kids: Tennis bracelet.
One kid: Authentic Pandora charm.
Multiple kids: Wal-Mart costume jewelry. When the kids break it, I won’t cry.
Housekeeping
No kids: Maid service for full spring cleaning.
One kid: Family cleaning day, no whining allowed.
Multiple kids: To be able to walk through the living room without stepping on a Lego.
NO. (Photo credit: dog.happy.art)
Car
No kids: Shiny new car, red bow attached.
One kid: Full tune-up, detail the interior.
Multiple kids: Find the source of that God-awful smell.
Clothes
No kids: Two words – Michael Kors.
One kid: A new outfit for date night.
Multiple kids: Socks that don’t have holes in them would be fantastic.
Night on the town
No kids: Weekend trip to NYC.
One kid: Dinner at a family restaurant that serves both mac n cheese AND wine.
Multiple kids: “McDonald’s” has never sounded so sexy.
That being said, I’ve saved my secret weapon for last. It is universally the gift that (nearly) every woman wants, it’s free, and it applies to every stage of life:
A day off.
Wash the dishes, vacuum, wrangle the kids if there are any, take the dog for a walk, do some laundry, make dinner, watch a chick flick with her, and give her a back rub. Merry Christmas.
