Another New Year (2025) is about to dawn – sure, many of us have ‘list of to do’ and that includes ‘many things you want to buy !’ – may be Merc Benz !! or a valuable diamond ring !! - heard of ‘Missing tile syndrome !!’
Most of us believe that if we tick a series of boxes (great job, fancy car, holiday destination, costly iphone, camera, etc.,) we attain success and live happily every after. Don’t confuse with the concocted myths of Tamil cinema – the highest paid actor would advise you not to run after money and the most paid writer would say, rich men are unhappy !! - whatever it be – Happiness is no destination.
There is joy in giving ! – recently went for a medical camp for students of Veda patashala and learnt life that how little things give happiness to hundreds of kids. The art of gift giving can come in many shapes and sizes, yet for some people, the ultimate gift is to revel in luxury and splendor.
In many parlance, ‘a costly diamond’ is the ultimate gift that women would feel happy about ! there was this diamond originally bought by Harriet Annenberg Ames, the sister of the billionaire publisher Walter Annenberg, in 1967. Annenberg Ames feared wearing the diamond in her native New York City, and decided to sell the stone. She later said that "I found myself positively cringing and keeping my gloves on for fear it would be seen. ... It sat in a bank vault for years. It seemed foolish to keep it if one could not use it. As things are in New York one could not possibly wear it publicly".
So it went on sale in an auction in Oct 1969 - with the diamond listed as lot 133, at Parke-Bernet in New York City. The diamond was flown to Gstaad in Switzerland so that the actress Elizabeth Taylor could see it, and flown back to the United States for the auction. Taylor's husband, the actor Richard Burton, had set a maximum bid of $1 million for the diamond, with his lawyer, Aaron Frosch, bidding on the telephone from London, and Al Yugler of the jewellers Frank Pollock and Sons, bidding in the room for Burton.
Elizabeth Taylor’s passion for glamorous jewels was legendary. Over the years she amassed a remarkable collection from the great houses—Bulgari, Cartier, Van Cleef & Arpels and more. The jewels and diamonds were gifts from husbands, lovers and friends, and many she purchased for herself right up until she died at age 79 in 2011.
The Taylor–Burton Diamond, a diamond weighing 68 carats (13.6 g), became famous in 1969 when it was purchased by actors Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor. Burton had previously been the underbidder when jeweller Cartier bought the diamond at auction for $1,050,000, setting a record price for a publicly sold jewel. Thousands of people in New York and Chicago queued to see the diamond after its 1969 sale.
Taylor stunningly wore the diamond at the 42nd Academy Awards on 7 April 1970, where she wore a dress designed by Edith Head. Taylor presented the Academy Award for Best Picture to Midnight Cowboy at the ceremony. A $1 million insurance policy was secured against the diamond with Lloyd's of London. The terms set by Lloyd's stipulated that it could only be publicly worn for thirty days in any given year, that it be stored in a vault, and that Taylor was to be accompanied by armed guards when wearing it in public. Taylor would later have a replica made of the diamond that cost $2,800. After her second divorce from Burton in 1978, Taylor sold the diamond in June 1979 to Henry Lambert, a jeweller from New York for a figure believed to between $3–5 million. Part of the proceeds from the sale funded the construction of a hospital in Botswana. Taylor and Burton's second marriage had taken place in Botswana in 1975.
Moving away to history, in 1778, after three years of war with Great Britain, the United States was short of money and signed a treaty of alliance with France. This treaty gave them an unlimited supply of weapons and military support to win the American Revolutionary War and included enough money to get through the war. On September 3, 1783, the war resulted in the independence of the United States. Today it remains the most expensive gift ever given in history with a value of €18,6 billion.
The Treaty of Alliance (1778)), also known as the Franco-American Treaty, was a defensive alliance between the Kingdom of France and the United States formed amid the American Revolutionary War with Great Britain. It was signed by delegates of King Louis XVI and the Second Continental Congress in Paris on February 6, 1778, along with the Treaty of Amity and Commerce and a secret clause providing for the entry of other European allies. The agreements marked the official entry of the United States on the world stage, and formalized French recognition and support of U.S. independence that was to be decisive in America's victory.
Meandering away, we want to be happy and have all along been led to believe that happiness is a final destination — one that can be reached if we make the right choices, learn from our mistakes, and keep pushing forward. We are taught that, once we finally find it, we’ll be forever satisfied in our lives, and so we live feeling overwhelmed and inadequate, chasing this dream, never stopping to question if it is, in fact, flawed.
The reality is that it is flawed. “Happiness” is not a destination. It’s a state of mind, and you don’t need to be in it every moment of every day. Not only is that impossible, but it’s also unhealthy. Life is complex and uncertain. Ups and downs are normal. The day you land that promotion you’ve been longing for might also be the day you suffer your first heartbreak. It is said where attention goes, energy flows. If we focus on negativity, we will perpetually be unhappy despite having everything. The Missing Tile Syndrome is an obstacle to happiness.
It’s so easy to focus on what we don’t have in life rather than enjoying the things in our life that we do have. Even though we have a life filled with happiness and all blessings, we often obsess for the things which are missing. “Missing Tile Syndrome” is simply focusing on the things which we are missing and thus robbing ourselves of happiness. Imagine that you are in a Museum and look up and see a beautiful ceiling made up with thousands of tiles. As you look around – your eyes gets fixed on that one tile that is missing. Although the rest of the ceiling is perfect and beautiful, many thoughts are fixed on that missing and mars enjoying the wholesome beauty !!
Don’t worry – Be happy ! – life is not to be spent worrying ! – morning thoughts of aasami sirippu sinthanaiyan !
Regards – S Sampathkumar
23.12.2024
