It's not easy having to juggle the needs of three kids in different phases of their lives on top of having to take care of a home. The littlest is in a very needy, clingy phase and he still demands for my milk every few hours. The middle one is in Kindergarten 2 this year and is trying hard to cope with the new syllabus and weekly spellings. The big girl is in Primary 3 and I must say her workload is much increased as compared to previously, and it seems like there is a good deal of homework to complete every day. Will we be bogged down by homework, tests, exams and lots of studying from now on? I seriously don't think life is easy for a primary schooler but at least the good thing is she loves going to school. Phew.
Nonetheless, I've realised that while I've taken care of their needs, making sure they have food to eat, their homework is done, their uniforms are ironed, they get to go for their enrichment classes, they go to school on time, they get to watch movies, they have toys to play with and so on, it seemed to me that I was just getting by the days without making them really count at times. It didn't help that solo parenting made me so tired on some days that all I wanted to do was get past each day, survive with the kids, get the chores done and make it through to another sunrise. No matter how some of you might think I am a super mum, the truth is I am not as super as I hope I can be and I do get tired, I do flare up, I do lose my cool and I do things that I'm not proud of too.
In February's "Happiness is...", it's about reminding myself that no matter how busy life gets, I need to make time to connect. I need to connect with family and friends, I need to let the kids connect with nature, play and outdoor fun, I need to connect with the hubby and I need to let the kids connect with me as a mom too. That is what I want to do.
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This year, I was so relieved and delighted that the hubby had the chance to come with us. We came on a weekend afternoon and surprisingly, it wasn't as packed as I imagined and we had such a good time shopping for CNY goodies, sampling treats (I lost count of how many jellies they ate), listening to CNY songs, admiring the lanterns and decorations and taking a photo with this super cute doggie family of five.
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I think I nag a lot at home and the one who suffers most from it is the eldest. I'm always asking her to finish her work, to look after her siblings, to help out in the house and so on. Sometimes, I tell myself to hold my tongue and just let her indulge, connect and have some fun with her siblings - even when her homework is not yet done.
This was a sight I witnessed when I was cooking dinner halfway and went into the playroom to check on the kids. They were all sitting on the bed, the boy was busy doing his own thing while the eldest was holding an ukulele and strumming away (she can't play but we can all strum at least, right?) as she made up a story and the younger sister would use their stuffed toys and puppets to act it out. Very creative, very heartwarming.
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I love chatting with them about how their day went, about the latest movie we watched, about current affairs, about their experiences in school and all the cute stories they have to share about their classmates, friends and teachers. Mealtimes are one of the best ways for us to connect as mom and kids, and I feel so strongly about this topic that I've been wanting to write a post on it. Wait for it to come soon!
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Last but not least, the main highlight of February has to be.... CHINESE NEW YEAR, of course! It's my favorite festive season (Christmas comes a close second) and I love how we get to visit and gather with family and friends, have reunion lunches and dinners, play card games, feast on yummy food and goodies, and most importantly, stay connected with the people who matter in our lives.
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We were busy right from the eve of CNY where we had reunions and the kids stayed up till 2am to 守岁 (as they watched TV, haha) all the way till 元宵 and we still have more gatherings to come this weekend. I was so glad that I managed to host my secondary school friends because these are the people who I've known for over two decades of my life and shared so many ups and downs with. I hope you all enjoyed your time at A Happy Home and that the BBQ was as enjoyable as we hoped it would be, despite all the hiccups like a faulty pit.
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It was also awesome that we got to visit my grandma thrice in a row and spend some precious time with her because now that she has dementia and can't remember clearly who we are, my heart aches for her and I just want her to be as happy as possible. Seeing her great grandchildren and having us around her definitely helps to cheer up her day!
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I love watching lion dance performances as a kid so I make sure my kids get to watch it every year too. You know how different it is to watch a live one as compared to one shown on the TV, right? So this year, I was searching for all the places where we could catch a show and was elated that we caught the first show at Waterway Point. It was mad awesome and even involved drums with changing LED lights, a dragon dance, mascots and a breathtaking lion leaping over the poles performance. Woohoo! I remember it was during their Heguru classes and I was the only parent who pulled the kids out halfway just so that they could watch the show - so much so that the teachers had to ask me to do it discreetly so I wouldn't disrupt the class. Oops. It was very much worthwhile though! And I was so glad I went to chope a nice spot so we could watch the entire show in full view. Awesome!
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The one thing that keeps me going when the going gets tough is these little surprises and assurance from my kids which motivate me and give me the determination I never knew I had. Writing cards and sweet notes to one another is one of the ways the girls and I stay connected and I hope they know how much all these sweet little acts of theirs mean to me.
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To more happiness in March!