Dating Magazine

Got an Itch You Need to Scratch?

By The Guyliner @theguyliner

I will never forget that red-letter day back in the dying days of the 20th centurywhen my then-flatmate asked if I could take a peek at his family jewels. Given that he'd presented only as straight before then, and that if you cut him in half like a stick of rock, the words "GAY PANIC" would run through him, I was surprised by this sudden tangent. It turned out, after a few seconds of stunned silence, that this was not a come-on, but a request for medical assistance. Chris had something nasty on his woodshed, and wanted me to give my expert opinion. Quite why he assumed I'd have the requisite knowledge to diagnose him - some low-level homophobia that I was too dim to see at the time, perhaps - but I reluctantly went forth and had a look. Redness. Some kind of... oh I couldn't go on, so bade him snap back the waistband of his tanga briefs.

"Can't you just go to the, y'know, clinic?"

"No!" he squealed. "I'd be too embarrassed. What if somebody sees me?"

"Nobody is going to be interested! You're not fascinating and you're not famous."

But it's true, isn't it, that sometimes there's still this sense of shame around sexually transmitted infections? Perhaps it's the method of infection and our own outdated hangups over sex, or the feeling that STIs are somehow "dirtier" than other illnesses. Whatever it is, it's led to a rise in some STIs - according to this article on STIs from LloydsPharmacy Online Doctor, a recent report by Public Health England (PHE) says syphilis cases are up to the highest number since 1949 - and that's not a good look for any of us. While we may be talking more openly about sex and sexual health, if we're not actually doing anything about our issues, we're at risk of infecting others and also damaging our long-term health. Chlamydia, the most commonly diagnosed STI in 2017, can lead to fertility problems if left untreated.

What you need to be doing, then, is getting this checked out regularly. I eventually persuaded Chris to go the local clinic and he was back to his rampant self within days - sadly there was no cure for the terminally embarrassing underwear. I do hope, wherever he is now, that he's managed to get over his embarrassment over STIs and, crucially, invested in some decent trunks.

One group most at risk from infection are young heterosexuals between the ages of 15-24. And it may be that this generation is more open about their sexual health - even if they're a little more blasé about it. One friend who went for a routine test and shared the waiting room with the hospital's STI clinic was amazed by the shareability of an STI. She told me there were people FaceTiming their friends while they waited to be seen, and doing Instagram Live videos of their progress. "I kind of admired how open they were but, of course, I didn't want them to get me on video in case anyone I knew saw me and thought I had an STI! I'm too old and too married to have one, surely!"

No such thing, darling!

If sitting in a waiting room isn't for you, LloydsPharmacy Online Doctor gives people a safe and convenient way to be checked, by delivering tests to your own home. Good to have options!

This post was produced in partnership with LloydsPharmacy Online Doctor and I received payment. Chris*, get in touch, and I'll send you a few quid for some new shreds. *All names have been changed. Except mine.

You Might Also Like :

Back to Featured Articles on Logo Paperblog

These articles might interest you :

  • Big Food Giants Manipulate Public Health Policy in China

    Food Giants Manipulate Public Health Policy China

    Coca-Cola is at it again. As soda sales decline in the United States and Europe, beverage companies look to emerging economies like China for growth. And, it... Read more

    The 15 January 2019 by   Dietdoctor
    DIET & WEIGHT, HEALTH, HEALTHY LIVING, MEDICINE
  • Jewellery for a Precious You

    Jewellery Precious

    Jewellery is always close to a woman’s heart. It completes her look and boost confidence. Considering the changing trends in jewellery fashion, it becomes... Read more

    The 15 January 2019 by   Dr.jenifer Sayyed
    LIFESTYLE
  • Rajshri Productions’ Next Is A Film On Friendship | Hum Chaar | Trailer

    Abhishek Dixit’s debut feature film Hum Chaar is a Bollywood film made under the banner of Rajshri’s film. Hum Chaar is written and directed by Abhishek Dixit. Read more

    The 15 January 2019 by   Themoviean
    ENTERTAINMENT, MOVIES
  • Saint Paul the First Hermit

    Saint Paul First Hermit

    Today is the feast day of Saint Paul the hermit. This is a sweet and delicate Oatmeal Bread topped with rolled oats and naturally sweetened with agave. Saint... Read more

    The 15 January 2019 by   Veronica46
    FOOD & DRINK, RECIPES
  • Irupathiyonnaam Noottaandu | Teaser | Pranav Mohanlal | Arun Gopy

    Arun Gopy’s Irupathiyonnaam Noottaandu is an upcoming Malayalam action-drama feature film starring Pranav Mohanlal and Zaya David in the lead roles. Read more

    The 15 January 2019 by   Themoviean
    ENTERTAINMENT, MOVIES
  • A Year Of Body Positivity

    Year Body Positivity

    Last January, as I sat there on New Years eve all set to make the same old resolutions I've made year after year for as long as I can remember, I realised how... Read more

    The 15 January 2019 by   Sparklesandstretchmarks
    DIARIES, SELF EXPRESSION
  • Garden Bloggers Bloom Day – Jan 2019

    Garden Bloggers Bloom 2019

    Euphorbia rigidaWhen I went out to take the photos for this blog post I was surprised at how much was in flower dotted around the garden. Read more

    The 15 January 2019 by   Patientgardener
    GARDENING, HOME

Magazines